


Two Bottles of Whiskey and Some Sweet Company

by AnnieSoFar, Dark_Moon_Wolf



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Aubrey is super protective, Beca is a huge dork, Cheating, Eating Disorders, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Suicide attempt, Just a huge dollop of some more angst, Panic Attacks, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Hatred, a whole lot of miscommunication, also i am such staubrey trash, buttercup - Freeform, fuck off hilary, its adorable, jesse is an asshole, like it pains me, like oh my god so much, there is some happiness i swear, theres a hell of a lot of crying
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-07
Updated: 2016-06-08
Packaged: 2018-05-18 20:59:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 39,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5942902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnieSoFar/pseuds/AnnieSoFar, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dark_Moon_Wolf/pseuds/Dark_Moon_Wolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chloe's world comes crashing down after a series of unfortunate events and dark secrets are revealed, but who will be there to pick up the pieces? Beca, of course.</p><p>(Written in role-play format, Beca's POV written by Dark_Moon_Wolf, Chloe's POV written by AnnieSoFar)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Just Friends

**Author's Note:**

> I am deeply sorry for the angst in this chapter. But it only gets worse. Have fun!

Beca walked through the door of the Bella house, sighing as she threw her keys into the bowl by the door. She noticed the distinct lack of noise in the house; she knew the majority of her fellow Bellas had class but she knew that Chloe was definitely finished for the day, and the fact she couldn't hear the redhead pottering round the kitchen singing bad show tunes was concerning.  
  
She lifted the strap of her bag off over her head and threw it down on the sofa as she walked further into the room, looking for Chloe as she went. "Chlo?" she called out to no reply. She stepped into the kitchen with a frown. The room was empty, 'where is she?' Beca thought to herself as she made her way towards the stairs and called up, louder, "Chloe, you in?" she waited patiently for a response.  
  
Chloe heard Beca calling her, but couldn't find her voice to respond. The only sound that escaped her mouth was a short sob, that she desperately tried to muffle, pressing the palm of her hand tightly against her mouth. She sat on the corner of her bed, pressed tightly into the corner it made with the wall, hugging her knees to her chest. She frantically wiped away at the hot tears trailing down her cheeks as she heard Beca's footsteps approaching.  
  
Beca frowned again and looked at the clock thinking that Chloe must be in but shrugged it off. 'Perhaps she's asleep' she thought. She started up the stairs and yawned, she'd had a tiring day of classes and thought a nap would do her good. She reached the landing and involuntarily found her gaze point to Chloe's door which was ajar. She continued along the landing and when she reached the stairs to the attic she heard a faint sound coming from behind her. She paused to figure out whether she'd actually heard it or just imagined it. She turned around to listen again. She heard an unmistakable sniffling sound coming from Chloe's room. Any tiredness that Beca had felt instantly drained out of her body as she rushed towards Chloe's door but stopped herself before she entered, she didn't want to just barge in on Chloe. "Chlo? You okay? It's Beca..." she stood hovering outside waiting for permission, her heart aching at the upset sounds coming from the redhead.  
  
Chloe froze at the sound of Beca's voice, suddenly much closer than before. She swallowed, taking a deep breath as she tried desperately to compose herself. Although she tried, she couldn't stop the way her voice cracked as she stammered out "Yeah... I'm fine" As her voice broke, she covered her mouth with one hand, to stop the wave of sobs that followed; using the other to wipe her face in an attempt to look somewhat presentable.  
  
Beca let her face fall in anguish at the upset and pain she could hear in Chloe's voice. "Are you sure? Can I-erm-can I come in, Chlo?" Beca asked with a soft voice and a hand resting on the door.  
  
Chloe nodded to herself, she didn't know what to do but she knew if anybody could help it would be Beca. When she realised Beca couldn't see her, she called out one simple word. "Please."  
  
Beca picked up on the desperation in Chloe's voice and didn't have to be asked twice and so she opened the door, her eyes instantly locking onto Chloe's. She noticed the tear stains down her cheeks and the general sadness about her friend. She closed the door behind her and automatically walked up to Chloe and her hands found their way to Chloe's arms. She rubbed up and down comfortingly as she whispered, "Oh, Chlo..! Hey, what's happened?" Beca's face was laced with concern as she guided Chloe to sit down on her bed.  
  
Chloe allowed Beca to sit her down and tried to compose herself to explain her distress, but her mind was reeling and Beca's concern caused Chloe's tears to overflow. Without thinking, her arms found their way around Beca's waist as she sobbed into her shoulder, squeezing Beca like she was holding herself together. "Tom.... Fucking her.... Said he loved me... Lies lies lies" She managed to choke out, her breathing became erratic as she became even more distraught, her voice muffled by the fabric of Beca's top as she cried into her.  
  
Beca was caught slightly off guard at the tight grip with which Chloe held onto her. Chloe's touch to her waist made her gasp lightly, it hurt Beca to see Chloe this upset and Chloe's hyperventilation meant that Beca couldn't follow the redhead's words properly. What she thought she heard caused her to heat up with rage, 'Tom, you better not have fucking hurt her!' she thought to herself. Beca took a breath and spoke to Chloe softly, "Hey, hey...slow down, breathe slower okay?" Beca was rubbing Chloe's back in slow circular motions with her hand as she mimed breathing in and out making sure not to break eye contact with Chloe. "You're okay, you're safe, just calm down." Beca said softly to Chloe. After a few moments of Chloe's breathing slowing to a calmer rate and Beca stroking her hair in comfort, Beca broke the silence, "Okay, now go on, what's happened, eh?" She asked as she moved some hair out of Chloe's face and wiped a tear away.  
  
Chloe managed to take in a few shuddering breaths as she focused on Beca's voice to calm her. She swallowed harshly and her usually light and bubbly features darkened visibly. "I finished class early so I went round to his apartment to surprise him and the door was unlocked so I went in and he was there and he was... he was.." she stammered out, before the tears returned and her head fell into her hands in dismay.  
  
Chloe didn't have to finish her sentence for Beca to know exactly what she'd walked in on. Beca's hands were round Chloe’s shoulders comforting her instantly, her eyes fell closed in pure sadness for Chloe. Her heart was aching... Beca opened her eyes and moved to kneel down on the floor in front of Chloe who was still bent over, softly crying. "Oh, Chloe, I'm so sorry..."   Beca trailed off, before deciding to continue. She placed a hand on Chloe's cheek and softly nudged her chin up so her eyes were fixed on Beca's. "Hey, it's going to be okay...I promise..." Beca's face turned from one of comfort and concern to one of anger. "I'm gonna kill him..." She muttered quietly.  
  
Chloe laughed and the sound made Beca wince; it wasn't the usual melodic laugh that usually spilled from Chloe's lips on a pretty much hourly occurrence; it was harsh and bitter and broken. Chloe's face remained stoic but that immense hurt was obvious behind her eyes. "I mean I must have deserved it" She said plainly, her entire body sinking with realisation, "I obviously wasn't good enough." She laughed again, and if Beca thought the sound couldn't get darker, she was wrong. "What the fuck is wrong with me, Becs?"  
  
Beca looked up at Chloe, unable to form anything resembling words for a good 20 seconds. She was kneeling in front of the woman who she thought was, no, the woman who she knew was amazing and talented and beautiful and kind and considerate and funny and perfect...and she was asking what was wrong with her...? The question broke Beca right then and there. Beca blinked and two tears fell down her cheeks and were followed by a steady stream of tears from both eyes. All she could manage was a long shaky breath out before she answered. "Chlo..?" Beca started. "There is nothing, absolutely nothing wrong with you..." Her voice was weak and tearful. When Beca noticed that Chloe started to shake her head, Beca cleared her throat, moved her hands to Chloe's knees and spoke with a stronger, more convincing tone. "This... is  _not_ your fault, you did not deserve it! Don't you dare let me here you say that again!" If it wasn't for Beca's words being in complete praise and defense of Chloe, it could sound like Beca was angry at Chloe. "You've done nothing wrong! This is all on Tom!" Beca was getting angry, not at Chloe of course, but Tom.  
  
Beca's outburst had Chloe frozen to her seat. All she could do was watch as Beca sang her praises and repeated that this wasn't her fault. But it was, fuck, of course it was Chloe's fault. If she'd been a better girlfriend, if she'd spent less time on the Bellas, this wouldn't have happened. This was all on her and Beca was wrong. Beca didn't understand and Chloe didn't deserve a friend like her. She didn't deserve to be told that she deserved better, what she deserved was exactly what Tom did to her; brake her heart. Chloe's voice could cut glass with its harshness as she spoke. "You're wrong." She reached across the gap between then to wipe the tear falling down Beca's cheek. Her pale blue eyes were locked on Beca's and her voice came out in barely more than a whisper as she spoke. "This is all my fault"  
  
Beca felt crushed, her heart felt like it had been ripped from her chest and thrown onto broken glass before being steamrollered flat. The touch of Chloe's soft, warm hand to her cheek was enough to cause her heart rate to increase. "No, I..." She started before taking a sharp breath in, "I can't let you think that..." Another sharp intake of air. "Don't say that you spend too much time on us Bellas" Beca said through tears - as if she could read Chloe's mind. "We need you, Chloe! This" Beca said gesturing the room "is your dream, Chlo! And that..." Beca's voice broke and she had to swallow hard before continuing, "That’s important." She was still kneeling at Chloe's knees, looking up at the person she most admired in the whole universe.  
  
Chloe titled her head as she let Beca's words wash over her. She let her hand linger on Beca's cheek and she leaned closer, her eyes staring into Beca's. "Why are you doing this Becs?” She whispered, her face, just centimetres away from the brunette's, "Why are you treating me like I'm anything special?" Her heart thudded in her chest as she suddenly noticed their close proximity, but she didn't move; Beca's gaze had her frozen.  
  
Beca's breaths got more rapid and shallow as Chloe inched closer to her. Her lips parted slightly and her eyes flickered between Chloe's eyes and mouth. "Because..." Beca started only to trail off distracted by Chloe. "Because...” She tried again "...because you are..." Beca finished. Beca had a feeling that this wasn't enough to convince the redhead and so she closed her eyes briefly before lifting her hand to touch Chloe's cheek, ever so gently. Beca's eyes welled up again. "You're everything to me" the brunette whispered, her eyes widening at the realisation of what she had just admitted. She froze, unsure of how Chloe would react.  
  
Chloe's hand, which had been wiping away a stray tear from Beca's face, stilled completely. She felt like her heart had stopped as Beca's words echoed through her thoughts, and she gasped for air after she realised she, and possible Beca also, had been holding her breath for a considerable amount of time. So much information had passed through Chloe today that she felt completely overwhelmed with it all and Beca's admission hit her hard and fast. She sat back, distancing herself from Beca and from where she now realised her eyes had been lingering a little too long on the other girl's lips. Chloe cleared her throat, her eyes flitting around the room as she looked almost everywhere but at Beca.  
  
Beca's eyes widened further still as Chloe moved away and withdrew her hand from Beca's face, "Oh God, I, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Chloe, I thought..." Beca stood up and stepped back, away from the redhead, her words trailing off. The tears began again as Beca raised her hands. "I'm sorry", the apology came out a barely audible whisper as she stepped back, almost tripping over various sheets of music that Chloe had left all over the floor from a previous singing practice. “God, Beca you're so fucking stupid!” Beca chastised herself...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the cliffhanger. Well, not really.


	2. Bruises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I said there was more angst, well here it is. Sorry it's a little short, I just wanted to kill you with a cliffhanger.

Chloe blinked rapidly as she tried to process what had happened, her mind reeling as her thoughts trailed off: Beca - Beca moving away from her - Beca crying. Once she'd got that through her head, alarm bells rang and she jumped up, crossing the room to Beca instantaneously. She took Beca's hands from where they were raised in the air, intertwining their fingers as she lowered them to her side. "Hey, hey I'm sorry. Hey, Becs look at me, hey, you're not stupid, listen to me, you're not stupid." She murmured soothingly, trailing up and down Beca’s side with one hand, as the other was still squeezing the brunette's hand. Once Chloe had Beca's attention, she spoke again. "Please stay" she said softly, using the hand that was currently linked with Beca's to pull her back towards the bed. "I can't be alone" she mumbled sadly as she dropped Beca's hand to sit back down on the bed, patting the space next to her, inviting Beca to join.  
  
Beca frowned slightly, she blinked out a few more tears and wiped the rest away. "You sure Chlo? ...I didn't mean to freak you out, I just, I couldn't listen to you putting yourself down like that." Chloe was nodding and continuing to pat the bed for Beca to join her and so Beca lowered herself onto the bed next to Chloe and turned to look the redhead in the eyes. Beca interlocked their fingers together gently, careful to look for any signs of hesitation from Chloe, she could find none.  
  
They sat for a while in what was a comfortable silence, their fingers intertwined. Slowly, cautiously, Chloe leaned her head against the brunettes shoulder. When Beca didn't jerk away, or react in any way, she settled a little more. She sighed, "I don't even know why I'm so upset." her voice was soft, quiet, but with the otherwise silence room, either of the pair could hear a pin drop.  
  
When Chloe placed her head on Beca's shoulder, Beca's stomach started turning somersaults and Beca let a smile develop over her face. It was taking everything in her, not to wrap her arms around Chloe and kiss her right there and then but she didn't want to freak her out at all. Instead, Chloe's words had intrigued her and she wanted to find out more, "Oh? Go on..?" Beca responded alongside a slight squeeze of Chloe's hand.  
  
Chloe used her free hand to run through her hair, not wanting to let go of Beca's hand. "God it sounds so awful now I think about it Becs, but ... I don't think I really loved him. At least, not in the way you hear about in songs and movies. It was easy and simple and I could deal with that because everything else in my life was so complicated so I settled and now it's all fucked up and I'm breaking and I don't know why because I didn't even care that much in the first place" Chloe sighed, leaning closer into Beca.  
  
In all the time that Beca had liked Chloe she always knew that if she wanted to tell Chloe everything then she'd have to pick her moment. She could sense that a possible moment could be coming up in this conversation but she thought taking it slow would be best. She sighed, with contentment and watched Chloe as she explained her feelings. "Chloe, you feel like you're breaking because you care about him and even if you feel like you didn't ever really love him, what he's done, it's still a betrayal..." Beca hoped that advice didn't sound totally moronic. She decided to lighten the mood a little, "I'll still kill him for you if you like?" She asked smiling and nudging Chloe's shoulder with her own.  
  
Chloe smiled weakly "I'd rather you cuddled me instead" she joked, detaching their hands so she could pull Beca's arm around her waist. After she settled comfortably against Beca, and a few more moments of silence, she asked "Do you ever wonder why love is so complicated?"  
  
Beca grinned as Chloe pulled her arm over her waist. She felt her cheeks heat up and was almost certain that they'd turned a definite shade of scarlet, thankfully, Chloe's head was resting below Beca's and so she still had a few moments. "Wow, Chlo, you don't shy away from the big questions!" Beca thought for a few seconds before continuing. "I think it's just so much harder to love nowadays, societal norms and game playing. Sometimes I wish it was simple, you know? Like if somebody liked me then, I, I, I'd want to be told about it, you know?" Beca stuttered a little in the middle of that sentence because she knew the weight of what she was saying. "What, err, what about you?"  She asked looking down at Chloe.  
  
Chloe sighed, listening to Beca's words. "I just hate how everything always seems to get in the way." She began, hesitating slightly, "Like two people could be perfect for each other but something always stops them from actually being happy together, you know?" Chloe paused again, before remembering Beca asked her a question "Id wanna know. If somebody liked me, that is, id wanna know t-"

Chloe was cut off by a large, obnoxious knocking on the front door just below them. She was about to ignore it and hope they'd come back later when she heard and all too familiar voice calling for her. "Chloe, I know you're there! Please can we talk? I'm sorry!"  
  
Beca's smile grew and she felt ecstatic when Chloe said that she'd want to know if someone liked her. 'Aha! Here's the moment!' Beca thought to yourself. That's when Tom's voice was heard by the two girls from downstairs yelling for Chloe. 'Aarrghhh!!' Beca screamed inside her head. As soon as Beca heard him her face changed into a scowl and she had already, reluctantly, let go of Chloe and was almost at the door of Chloe's room within seconds. "Don't worry Chlo, I'll teach him to come pounding round here after cheating on you like this!" 'And ruining a perfectly good moment to tell the woman I love that I love her!' She added in thought. Beca was rushing for the door, full of rage with Chloe in hot pursuit behind her.  
  
Chloe followed Beca down the staircase to the front to confront Tom. Her earlier distress and sadness had been replaced with white hot rage courtesy of Beca's pep talk and all she wanted to do was give Tom a piece of her mind. When she reached the door, Beca was already in full swing; yelling and threatening Tom with some _very_ unsavory things, when Chloe tapped her lightly on the shoulder, letting Beca know she had this. Tom looked relieved to see the redhead, but that particular expression was wiped off his face as Chloe's fist connected with his nose, giving a satisfying crunch. Blinding white hot pain shot through Chloe's hand and she stumbled back through the front door and into Beca, as she heard Stacie shout "And fucking stay away, asshole" before slamming the door. Chloe looked over at Beca, before back to her hand and shouted "Owowow _fuck_!"  
  
Beca rushed over to Chloe, her vision honing in on her hand. The knuckles were all red and raw-looking and her fingers were trembling, she was sobbing into her other hand, stood looking so small and fragile. Beca was breathing heavily and her anger subsided briefly to take Chloe's hand with the softest touch. "Hey, hey, Chlo...go and sit in the kitchen, okay? Stacie will get you a drink." she said gesturing between Chloe, Stacie and the kitchen. As Chloe turning, nodding, Stacie came to her side and placed an arm around her waist bad walked her to the kitchen. Beca spun around to face Tom who was clutching his nose in pain. 'Damn, Chlo! Who knew you had that in you!' Beca thought to herself as her features etched into a smile for a brief second. Tom attempted to follow Chloe but was met with Beca's hand on his chest. "You really think I'm gonna let you back there!? _Really_!?" Beca asked, furious.  
  
"She's _my_  girlfriend" He spat indignantly, glaring at Beca. "I can follow her wherever I like." He tried again to push past Beca, blocked him again. "Let me through, bitch."  
  
From the kitchen, Chloe heard Tom's words and jumped up from her seat at the kitchen table, ignoring Stacie's pleas for her to sit down. She angrily stormed towards the front door, and on seeing Tom, raised her left hand. "Don't you dare think I won't hit you with my good hand, you asshole" She challenged, placing a hand on Beca's shoulder briefly to tell her she was okay. She came face to face with Tom, smirking slightly at the bruise that was already appearing over his nose and across his cheekbone. "Don't you dare" she spoke darkly, enunciating her words as she stepped closer to him, "Talk to her like that. Don't you dare come back here again, Tom. I don't want to see you ever again."  
  
"I'll talk to her how I like" He sneered, squaring up to Chloe. He grabbed the wrist of her injured hand and she winced as he yanked her towards him. He lowered his voice "Don't forget your place Chlo, you're fucking nothing, _absolutely nothing_. Nobody else will love you like I do." Chloe yanked her arm back from Tom's grip, ignoring the pain. She wasn't gonna submit to him this time, not again. "Fuck off Tom." she spat, not bothering to turn back to look at him as she strode into the house. Before she could slam the door in his face, she couldn't block out the sound of him calling after her mockingly. "Can I hit you up for makeup tips? I never did get how you covered up those bruises." She couldn't block out the sound of his dark laugh, before she managed to force herself to move, slamming the door on him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another cliffhanger. Oops. Updates soon!


	3. I Love You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's a bit of a emotional roller coaster, i hope you're all strapped in.

A noisy silence fell between the pair, Beca was hovering at the other edge of the room, in shock. Chloe was currently facing the door with her head rested against it. Her breathing came out jagged and broken as she turned around to lean against the door. She lowered herself to the floor while sitting against the door and brought her knees up to her chest.

Beca was frozen to the spot, her mind racing with all the information she had just received. Tom had been hitting Chloe...and she hadn't noticed? She hated him, but she hated herself more. The brunette blinked a few times and slowly stepped towards Chloe. She opened her mouth to speak, realising that she had no idea what to say, she didn't want to say anything for fear of saying the wrong thing. Instead, she lowered herself down next to Chloe and placed an arm around Chloe's shoulders and rubbed up and down her arm with her other hand, softly. For a while, Chloe didn't make any effort to move closer to Beca, she just kept her head down to knees, making muffled sobbing sounds. Beca waited patiently for Chloe to lift her head.  
  
Chloe was panicking. Beca knew. Beca knew and could tell her secret to anybody she wanted. Chloe couldn't let that happen, she couldn't let people know how weak she really was, she couldn't. So she decided to do what she knew best: pretend everything was okay. Forcing herself to breathe calmly and wiped her face, turning to Beca with a false smile plastered to her face. "Thanks for sticking up for me, I'm gonna go study now" she said quickly, standing up and heading for the stairs.  
  
Beca's arms were frozen in the same position they were in when Chloe was sat down. 'What..? Just..? Happened..?' Beca thought to herself, she frowned and dropped her arms down so they were resting on her lap. She stood up and stood against the back of the sofa, frowning, confused... Her features softened as sudden realisation fell over her when she realised what Chloe was trying to do, pretend, pretend that everything was fine, deny, deny, deny. "God damn it Chlo!" Beca exclaimed under her breath. Beca looked up stairs before entering the kitchen.

Stacie was on her phone when Beca entered, she looked up from the screen to ask, "Where's Chloe?"

"Oh, she erm, she's gone upstairs to...study, I'm gonna go...sleep..." Beca responded as she opened the fridge and took a red velvet cupcake out and closed the door. "..I'll see you later"

"Okay...” Stacie says looking back to her phone, oblivious to the pain her red headed friend was going through. It didn't even occur to Beca to tell Stacie, she knew it would crush Chloe to know anyone else had found out. She started up the stairs...  
  
The tears came before Chloe had even reached the top of the stairs, and instead of heading to her room like she'd told Beca, she wandered into the bathroom down the hallway. Looking at herself properly for the first time since coming home, she laughed bitterly at her appearance; her makeup was smudged, her hair was a mess and her face was drained of colour. Tom was right, who could love this? She gripped the edges of the sink harshly, her knuckles turning white from the exertion. She was a mess and she didn't know what to do, how to make it better. She was alone. Without really thinking, she turned on the shower, letting the water run over her arm, not even noticing the freezing temperature, as she let her fingers linger on the button. Dropping her phone on the floor, she climbed into the bath, not bothering to undress as she let the water wash over her and drown her sadness.  
  
Beca continued up the stairs and after turning towards Chloe's room, she knocked and paused, only to be met with silence, she knocked again but there was no response. Beca was about to call out to her when she heard water running from the bathroom. A dark thought escaped to the front of her mind but she pushed it back as she walked towards the room. "Chlo?" She called out as she reached the door. There was no answer. "Chloe, you okay..?" She repeated as she leant on the door handle. The door was locked. "Chloe!" Beca called out, loudly. "Chloe, open the door" Beca shouted desperately as she jiggled the handle rapidly.  
  
Chloe could faintly hear Beca's urgent calls to her, could faintly here the rattling of the door; She wanted to respond, to call out to Beca and have her come and make this all go away, she wanted Beca to make it stop. But her entire body was frozen, the icy water soaking through her clothes, which clung to her like tightly; she couldn't speak. Her entire body shook, her elbows on her knees and her hands clutching fistfuls of her hair and all she could do was sob.  
  
Beca slammed her hand against the door repeatedly as she kept calling out to Chloe. The thought returned and Beca's calls became more frantic. ‘No, not Chloe, no, no, this isn't happening.’ She told herself. Beca paused to listen out for Chloe, her mind racing, all the details adding up to one, devastating conclusion for Beca. ‘Abuse, fear, a locked door, water running, no answer, Chloe.’ Beca's palms started sweating at the thought. “Chloe?! Stand back from the door, okay?” The brunette took a deep breath in and took a few steps away from the door. She ran up and shoved her shoulder into the door, breaking it open in one go. Beca's eye darted to her friend, all she could see was Chloe's back, she was sitting in the bath with the shower running, fully clothed. “Oh, Chloe! What are you doing?!” Beca asked running over to her. She assessed the situation and ultimately ended up with no concrete answers. Beca placed a hand on the back of Chloe's head, which was firmly resting on Chloe's knees. “Shit, Chloe, this is freezing!” Beca moved to turn the water off.  
  
As soon as Beca's hand touched her head, Chloe gasped, as she suddenly because hyperaware of her surroundings. The heat of Beca's skin on hers brought the sensation back to her body, and a shudder ran through her as her body began to react to being subjected to several minutes under a cascade of freezing water. "I'm broken Becs" she whispered, not lifting her head. "I didn't want to feel for a while"  
  
Beca wanted to reply to her saying, ‘no you're not, you're amazing! I love you!’ But instead, being too concerned about the temperature of the water drenching Chloe, she just moved her hands to Chloe's hands and loosened Chloe's grip on her hair. "Come, on..." She encouraged, Beca tried to lift Chloe's head up to meet her eyes but Chloe refused to let her. Beca sighed and grabbed a towel, placing over Chloe's shoulders. “Come on, Chlo. You can't stay in there!" Beca added, her eyes welling up.  
  
"I don't deserve you, you're too good to me" Chloe said softly, as she finally raised her head, flexing her fingers as the blood rushed back into them. She let Beca pull her up, and out of the bath, and only when they were finally stood face to face did Chloe notice the redness around Beca's eyes, the paleness of her complexion. "Why are you crying?" She said in a barely audible whisper, her hand instinctively reaching out to stroke Beca's face, her fingers ghosting over her cheek.  
  
Beca blinked quickly, looking over Chloe's body, making sure that other than the freezing water, she wasn't hurt. "I thought, I thought that..." Her voice was thick with emotion and she couldn't continue before the tears overflowed down her cheeks. After a few seconds, she tried to compose herself and avoided the question by using all of her focus to run Chloe down, dry her as best she could.  
  
Chloe stood silently as she let Beca attempt to dry her, the smallest hint of a smile crossing her face as she admired Beca's persistence despite the fact that her efforts were futile; Chloe's clothes were completely drenched. Beca's hand lingered over Chloe's dripping t shirt and the redhead's breath hitched. "You can take it off" she breathed, before realising the implications of her words, her cheeks flushing. She cleared her throat "I mean, thank you for trying but I'm gonna need to change."  
  
Beca had frozen at Chloe's words, her hands hovering in mid-air. When Chloe continued, she breathed a sigh of both relief and disappointment. "Ye-yeah, of course...I erm...I got you a cupcake by the way." Beca said pointing at the red velvet cake that Beca had placed on the shelf above the sink when she entered the room. Her face was a deep shade of crimson and prayed that Chloe wouldn't notice. "I'll be in my room, come up when you're done, yeah?" Beca smiled leaving the room. As she made her way upstairs she sighed with exhaustion at the events of the evening.  
  
Chloe shook her head, a grin spreading across her face as she plucked the cupcake from the shelf. "Beca Mitchell you absolute sweetheart" she murmured to herself as the padded across the hall to her room. After changing into a much warmer, dryer pair of black jeans and one of Beca's flannel shirts, (What, Beca was in her room 24/7 and her shirts were comfy, okay?) and blow drying her hair, she headed downstairs to the kitchen to grab a couple of plates and a knife. After doing so, she headed back up to Beca's room, making a quick detour back to her own to grab the cupcake. Since Beca's room was the attic and the door had broken off years ago in one of Fat Amy's drunken rendezvous with Bumper (the details of which remained secret, which was fine by the Bellas), Chloe called out "Knock knock" as she reached the top of the stairs, to catch Beca's attention.  
  
Beca had been trying to work on a track but since all the stress of Chloe's situation and her own situation with Chloe, she wasn’t getting very far. She was however still very much immersed in what she was working on. She had her headphones on and so didn't hear Chloe's 'knock knock'. She sat cross-legged on her bed, bobbing her head up and down slightly to the beat.  
  
Chloe grinned mischievously when she noticed the headphones perched atop Beca's head. Deciding to have a little fun, she tip toed up behind Beca, lightly placing the plates on the bed so to not drop them and potentially stain the carpet (Because even though Aubrey hadn't lived here in years, and even though she loved her best friend, the piercing shriek that came when Chloe dropped spaghetti on the cream carpet was something she could never forget). She managed to the creep up right behind Beca, letting her hands hover over each side of the head phones as she leaned down to get right beside Beca's neck. She quickly pulled the headphones off and whispered "I _said_  knock knock"  
  
Beca's heart nearly jumped out of her chest. She slammed the laptop closed and spin round to meet Chloe's piercing blue eyes. Beca was gripping her chest and breathing heavily. "Fuck...Chloe! God, you made me jump! I'm sorry, I didn't- I didn't hear you..." Beca explained before her face broke out into a smile. "Are you wearing my shirt?" Beca asked with a twinkle in her eyes as she placed her laptop on the floor and patted the bed for Chloe to sit.  
  
Chloe sat herself down next to Beca, picking up the cake from beside her and cutting it in half. "If you stopped leaving all you shit in my room, I wouldn't have to wear your clothes Mitchell" she teased, handing Beca one of the plates. Using her index finger, she swiped some icing from the top of her half, before sticking it in her mouth, drawing it out again with a 'pop'  
  
"Hey! I'm not complaining!" Beca replied, grinning. "It looks good on you...keep it" Beca continued before looking down at her half of the cupcake, this is exactly the type of thing that proves to Beca that Chloe is amazing. Beca had brought that cupcake up for Chloe and Chloe's instant reaction is to share it. So thoughtful. Beca thought smiling.  
  
"Maybe I will" Chloe winked at the brunette, laughing slightly. She shifted slightly uncomfortably where she sat for a moment. "Thank you" she said softly, placing her hand over Beca's. "For today I mean, for everything, you really are amazing Becs." she smiled, although her eyes were threatening to water. "And I'm sorry..." she trailed off, dropping Beca's gaze and staring pointedly into her lap.  
  
Beca knew they had to have this conversation sooner or later. She watched as Chloe's posture saddened. She placed her half of the cupcake on the floor and turned to face Chloe. "Hey...you are more than welcome, Chlo. What are you apologising for?" Beca asked as she turned her hand to hold Chloe's and gave a friendly squeeze.  
  
Chloe copied Beca, placing her own cupcake on the floor too. She shifted to sit crossed legged, facing Beca, which wasn't an easy task as she refused to let go of Beca's hand. Once she had managed it, she looked directly into Beca's eyes, "You _know_  why Becs" she replied, squeezing Beca's hand in return.  
  
Beca's heart sank. She dropped her head and loosened her grip on Chloe's hand, Chloe didn't. She sighed, closing her eyes as she let go of Chloe's hand and stood up to pace for a second before turning back to face Chloe. "Chloe, I can't do this anymore...I just, it's killing me..." The brunette waved her hands around before letting them drop to her sides.  
  
Chloe was on her feet in an instant. Trying to link their fingers again Chloe asked "Can't do what Becs? Talk to me" her voice small and innocent. When Beca didn't meet her gaze, she used her free hand to cup Beca's cheek, forcing her to look. "Please talk to me" she breathed, searching Beca's bright blue eyes for any sign of an answer.  
  
Beca's eyes welled up and she breathed a shaky breath. "Okay" she whispered. She lifted her own hand to place it over Chloe's on her cheek. "But please, sit down first..." Beca requested. As Chloe moved to sit on the bed, Beca was working up the courage to have this conversation. "Today's been crazy hasn't it?" She said, with a smile, trying to lighten the atmosphere and stall the inevitable.  
  
"Beca." Chloe said sternly, before softening her voice. "Stop trying to distract me, I know you too well for that." she placed a hand on Beca's knee, “You know you can tell me anything right? Hell I've told you enough today" Chloe laughed, before looking expectantly at Beca.  
  
Beca didn't return the laugh, she just raised her eyebrows sadly and took a deep breath. "Okay, well...there's a couple of things. First, I need you to know that _you_  can tell _me_  anything...this situation with Tom..." Beca felt Chloe's hand tense on her knee at the mention of his name. She placed a hand over Chloe's and continued. "...you could have told me what was going on, you know I wasn't going to judge you Chlo...I...lo..." Beca trailed off before she finished. "Second, _stop_  for the love of God, stop saying you deserve all this and that you don't matter... That...dickhead is wrong. You aren't nothing, you're everything and of course you'll be loved by others. People would be crazy to not love you..." Beca realised she'd been speaking without a break and took a deep breath. She tried to read Chloe's face but couldn't.  "Thirdly...I..." Beca started but trailed off in fear of rejection...  
  
Chloe paused, waiting for Beca to continue, but she didn't so the redhead spoke. "I know I could've told you" she said softly, suddenly finding a spot on the bed sheet interesting enough to stare fixedly on. "I wanted to, I came so close, _so_  many times Beca. He... I thought...” Chloe sighed, before taking a deep breath and continuing. "I thought you'd see me as weak." Without a pause, she moved closer to Beca, touching her cheek again. "And yes, maybe you're right and I deserve better than him, but I don't deserve you Becs. You're such a wonderful fr-" Chloe faltered. Because Beca wasn't her friend, not really. Beca was so, so much more than her friend and Chloe didn't have the words to tell Beca just how much she meant to her. Beca's words from earlier flashed through her mind and Chloe smiled nostalgically. "You're everything"  
  
Beca smiled, she'd wanted to hear that from Chloe for 2 years, "No. Not maybe I'm right...I _am_  right! You _do_  deserve better than him. You're everything...and I...well do you remember what we were talking about earlier before _he_  showed up? Beca whispered softly.  
  
"No offence Becs, because I honest to god, from the bottom of my heart, do listen to everything you say, but so much information has gone in and out of my head today, I honestly don't even remember what we were talking about ten minutes ago" Chloe chuckled, she used that hand resting on Beca's cheek to poke her nose gently. "Remind me?"  
  
Beca smiled at the affectionate poke. "Of course babe." She took a breath and continued, "Well, you asked me why love was so complicated and I answered and everything and asked you that if someone liked you, would you want to know...? You said you would..." Beca trailed off again...  
  
Chloe raised an eyebrow at the pet name, as Beca wasn't usually fond of them, but went with it anyways. She nodded, remembering the conversation much more vividly now. She tried to think to what Beca had said more recently, to try and see where this conversation was going, but her mind was drawing blanks. Chloe nodded as she watched Beca, "I would" her voice laced with a strange mix of sincerity and confusion.  
  
Beca froze slightly and felt her cheeks heat up, she hadn't realised she'd said 'babe' until Chloe's eyebrow raised up. "Well...I can't very well not tell you now, eh?" Beca paused to allow to meaning of the words drop for Chloe who was still sat with a frown on her face.  
  
The metaphorical penny, however, did not drop for Chloe and, still sporting a slight frown of confusion, she asked "Tell me what Becs?" She stared hard into the brunette’s eye, desperately trying to understand because she knew there was something she was supposed to get and her mind just wasn't catching on. Chloe wasn't stupid, despite what her Russian lit teacher would have people believe, and usually social cues and subtext was Chloe's forte but today, her usual ways of deducting hidden meanings were out of the window and all she could do was ask again, "Tell me what?"  
  
Beca chuckled quietly and shook her head at Chloe, sporting a huge grin. It was everything inside Beca to stop her from squealing in delight at how adorable Chloe was being right now. Suddenly any fear of a negative reaction from Chloe disappeared and she continued. "Chloe Beale...I, Beca Mitchell, love you..." This could still be taken as something a best friend might say but she hoped that Chloe would read her eyes and know that it means so much more than that.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oooooh


	4. Scars and Promises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for this. You'll understand why soon.

Chloe's eyes widened and her entire body tensed. No, Beca wasn't saying? She wasn't saying she was _in_  love with her, was she? Chloe was stuck because of course she loved Beca, and of course she'd be lying if she'd said Beca's face never entered her mind when she was kissing Tom, and Beca was her everything and no, Beca couldn't love her. Because Chloe destroyed everything that loved her.  Part of her wanted to, needed to blurt out that's she wanted this too, that it was okay and she wasn't rejecting Beca and that she might just need time, but other words tumbled from her lips before she could think "Don't say that." She breathed, her eyes never leaving Beca's. She didn't deserve Beca, and Beca, good, kind, sweet Beca, didn't deserve to put up with a wreck like Chloe.

The redhead's words winded Beca.Her chest tightened as she tried to decode those three words. 'Don't say that' the words echoing through the brunette's mind. 'Don't say that...don't say that...don't say that...' She decided that there was no hidden meaning; Chloe didn't like her back, she'd fucked up...again. "I'm sorry..." Was all she could manage to choke out. Beca was exhausted; physically, mentally, emotionally. Instead of her usual reaction to the realisation that she'd fucked up, which was trying to take back what she said, jumping out in panic, and desperately trying to explain herself...she just sat there sadly, sighing. There was no need to pretend anymore, Chloe knew she liked her (or she thought Chloe knew) and that she wasn't interested. "I'm sorry..." She repeated as a whisper.

Chloe tried to follow Beca's thought process, tried to comprehend why she was apologising when it was Chloe that should be saying sorry, sorry she wasn't good enough. Chloe shook her head, no, Beca was her friend, her best friend, Beca didn't think she wasn't good enough. Beca said she was her everything. And Beca thought Chloe didn't want her when she didn't want anything else. Pushing her own self deprecating thoughts aside for possibly the first time in her life, she intertwined her fingers with Beca's. "Look at me, Beca" She breathed, her voice soft and sultry.

Beca's gaze moved lazily to their interlocked hands, drained of energy and blinked a few times before she lifted her head and locked eyes with Chloe. She waited for Chloe to continue, without a word. Her face showed the expression of interest but exhaustion.

Chloe could see the exhaustion in Beca's face, she knew it was her fault, that she caused it. She couldn't formulate the words to explain to Beca her thoughts, her feelings and she suddenly became overwhelmed with emotion and did the one thing she knew would get her point across simply. She leaned towards Beca, closing the gap between, and lightly pressed her lips against Beca's.

As Chloe moved forward and their lips connected, Beca froze, not returning the kiss out of confusion and shock, her eyes wide with emotion. She lifted her hand and pushed Chloe away gently, breaking the contact. Her mouth made the shape of the word 'What..?' and sat there, staring at the redhead, forgetting about how her behaviour would look to Chloe.

Chloe blinked slowly, sitting back as she processed what had just happened. "Oh.... kay" she said slowly, her voice full of confusion and mild hurt. Feeling embarrassed for obviously completely misreading the situation, she bit her lip, trying to place as much distance between Beca as she could, short of falling off the end of the bed.

Beca's eyes hadn't left Chloe as she moved away. The blank expression on the brunette's face was replaced with one of realisation...her eyes widened. "Oh...I...you..? But you...?" the words came out jumbled and thick with emotion as she frantically gestured between the pair. Beca noticed the distance between them and instantly moved next to Chloe and placed her hand on the back of Chloe's neck. Her eyes were flicking between Chloe's eyes and mouth, her breathing increasing.    

Realisation hit Chloe like a ton of bricks, and all the pieces clicked into place. She smiled, ecstatic they were finally on the same page, after years of missing each other. "Are you gonna, or am I gonna have to ask?" Chloe teased, batting her eyelashes at Beca.

Beca, being Beca, kept quiet and allowed Chloe to continue. she selfishly wanted Chloe to be the one to speak the words...

"Kiss me Mitche-"

Chloe was cut off as Beca pressed her lips to Chloe's, somewhat clumsily and forcefully. She moved so she was kneeling on the bed and her head was higher than Chloe's, "Oh, Chlo..." she said between kisses as she lifted her hands to cup the redhead's face. After the moment of desperation had passed, Beca slowed the kiss to a more gentle but passionate one. 'Finally...' Beca thought in her head. She shifted her weight cautiously so Chloe was lying back on the bed with Beca next to her, her hands had moved to the redhead's waist. The contact between the girl's lips was never broken.

Chloe pulled back slightly, grinning mischievously. Planting her own hands firmly on the brunette's waist, she flipped Beca over so Chloe was pinning her, giggling as she did so. She ran her hand up Beca's side, along her jawline and placed a finger over Beca's lips, who had been about to speak. She leaned down, planting a light kiss on Beca's cheek. "This is nice" she mumbled, her lips still brushing Beca's cheek.

Beca smiled, blissfully at the touch of Chloe's hands on her body. she let her head fall back with her eyes closed. "Come here..." Beca whispered along with a lazy gesture of beckoning. Chloe lowered herself onto Beca so that she was resting her head on the brunette's chest. Beca stroked Chloe's hair softly and kissed her forehead, lovingly. "You're a fantastic kisser" Beca whispered into Chloe's hair.

"I try" Chloe chuckled, listening to Beca's melodic heartbeat. After some comfortable silence of simply enjoying each other's company, Chloe sighed, rolling off Beca and onto her front next to her, propping herself up with her elbows. "We should talk about-" She faltered, before gesturing between herself and Beca. "This"

Beca's eyes flew open. She tried to play it cool as she propped herself up on her own elbows. Her instinct was that Chloe immediately regretted their actions even though everything about Chloe's voice and body language showed that Chloe was very much into it. "Yeah...we should..." she said cautiously.

"So you're into girls, then?" Chloe laughed, brushing a stray hair from her face as she watched for Beca's reaction. "That's something I didn't know"

"Oh yeah?" Beca responded, raising her eyebrows and side smiling. "I could say the same about you!" Beca giggled, relaxing slightly.

Chloe pulled a face "Um, have you seen me? I'm literally wearing a plaid shirt" she replied, tugging on her collar to emphasise her point.

Beca looked down briefly to the shirt and looked back up at Chloe pulling the same face, "That’s my shirt!" she exclaimed in a fit of laughter.

Chloe joined in with Beca's laughter, pulling the brunette closer to her, wrapping her arms around Beca's waist. She hated to ruin the cute moment, but the question burned inside and she suddenly had to know. "What does this mean?"

The laughter settled down and Beca just lay there staring at Chloe in contentment. After a while, she realised that Chloe had asked her a question and her face reacted to this thought. "Oh..erm.." she pushed herself up to sit cross legged on the bed, "Well...I don't think we should rush into anything just yet...honey" Beca added the pet name, as much as she hated them, because she knew it would make Chloe happy.

Chloe nodded slowly, musing over Beca's words. She understood Beca's caution and knew they were going to have to talk about _that_  at some point, a conversation Chloe was dreading. She laughed at the pet name, seeing the awkwardness cross Beca's features. She found it ridiculously endearing.

Beca smiled, she pressed her hand to Chloe's cheek. "Don't worry..." Beca whispered as she stroked Chloe's cheek with her thumb. She lowered her face down to kiss Chloe on the forehead. She left her lips pressed against Chloe's forehead for a good 30 seconds before she slipped her arms around Chloe and squeezed gently. Beca found her face nuzzled into the crook of Chloe's neck. "I've got you..." Beca whispered into Chloe's hair.

"We have to talk about it, don't we" Chloe said quietly, pulling herself closer to Beca, running her fingers through Beca's hair.

Beca sighed, squeezing Chloe lovingly, "I'm afraid so, Chlo..." with an extra tight squeeze, Beca let go and intertwined her fingers with Chloe's. "Hey...it's okay...tell me everything." Beca moved her hand to Chloe's knee and rubbed it soothingly.

Chloe nodded slowly, swallowing the lump in her throat. "He didn't use to be like that, not in the beginning. That's why I said it was easy. It started after a few months, but I didn't really notice at first, I didn't think anything was wrong. He started telling me I couldn't see or talk to certain people and I just went along with it, I thought that was normal. Then it got... worse." She stopped, her words sticking inside her throat, unable to voice her thoughts.

Beca's heart sank at Chloe's words. She moved closer to Chloe, encouraging her to continue. "Go on..." Beca nodded smiling. "Remember, this whole, _entire_ , situation? Not your fault..."

Chloe nodded, "Not my fault," she repeatedly softly to herself before continuing. "The first time he h-, the first time was just a slap. I ran home and cried to Aubrey for hours and hours but I never told her why. God, I could've avoided this, but I was young, I was _so_  young and naive. He turned up at my dorm with a bunch of roses, and promised to never do it again, and I believed him" Chloe's voice cracked and she fell silent, trying to compose herself so she could speak again. "But it happened again and slowly but surely the apologies stopped and he made me feel like it was my fault, like I wasn't good enough. Fucking hell, I actually once tried to-" Chloe cut herself off, her eyes widening at her near revelation.

Beca's eyes copied Chloe's and widened, her breathing was increasing and her grip on Chloe's knee tightening. "Chlo...? What did you try to do?" Beca asked, her voice catching towards the end, terrified of what the answer would be... She realised that the concern in her voice could be mistaken for judgement and added, "You're okay here, hun, I won't think badly of you" as she placed a hand under Chloe's chin, comfortingly.

Chloe laughed, the sound was soft but humourless. She pulled up the sleeve of her left arm, holding it out to Beca. "You can't really see it any more, but it's there if you look closely" She said quietly, drawing a line up the middle of her wrist with her index finger. "I never told anybody, not even Aubrey. She thought I was missing rehearsals ‘cause I had the flu. Not sure how she bought that one when I live in Florida" she chuckled slightly.

Beca swallowed hard at the sight, a thin, white scar ran up Chloe's wrist. Beca lifted her hand to gently cup Chloe's arm. She stared at the scar, realising that the look of the scar showed that the cut went deep, deep enough to... She couldn't finish that thought, it was too painful. "Oh, baby..." This time the pet name came more naturally and Beca allowed a tear to roll down her cheek before wiping it away. She looked up to meet the redhead's eyes but Chloe was staring fixedly at her lap.

Chloe looked up at the sound of Beca's voice and frowned as she saw the brunette's tears. "Please don't cry Becs, it's okay." she said softly, leaning over and placing a light kiss on her cheek, fighting the urge to cry herself. Beca being so thoughtful and caring made Chloe well up far too easily.

Beca had no words for the pain she felt for Chloe in this moment. 'This....is far from okay...' Beca decided in her mind. "Please...if you ever...feel like this again, for any reason..." Another tear rolled down Beca's cheek before she continued. "Tell me, please...Don't go through this on your own..."

Chloe brought her hand up to Beca's cheek, to wipe away the tears that fell. "I'm okay now Becs" Chloe said softly, with a watery smile, "I promise" Chloe suddenly became overcome by the urge to hug Beca, to be closer to her, so she threw her arms around the brunette's waist, pulling her close. She nuzzled into Beca's neck and murmured "But I will tell you, if I ever do, I promise."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I'm really sorry.


	5. Jesse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Jesse's a thing, who else forgot?

Beca smiled as the redhead got closer. "Good" she whispered into Chloe's hair. She took a deep breath in before putting her hands on Chloe's back and returning the hug lovingly. She moved her head to kiss Chloe on the cheek firmly before placing her chin on Chloe's shoulder. "Hey...babe? You gonna eat your cupcake?" Beca asked, wanting to lift some of the tension that had fallen over the room. Just as Chloe pulled back from the pair's embrace, they both heard footsteps approaching the attic along with Fat Amy's voice singing the words to 'Bang Bang' by Jessie J in a very theatrical fashion.

Chloe froze, not knowing whether moving away from Beca would upset her, or whether Beca wanted Chloe to move away. Eventually, she settled for leaving one arm around Beca's back, laughing easily as she listened to Amy's singing.

As Amy's singing got closer, Beca's mind, which had been in a place of tranquil happiness being this close to Chloe and with the knowledge that her feelings were reciprocated by Chloe, started to overflow with fears of everyone finding out and....Jesse knowing...Jesse! She had completely forgotten about him! Beca flew up off the bed and moved to stand next to the bookshelf where she focused her attention on a pile of CDs just as Amy's head came into view... Beca grimaced to herself as she knew how rude she was being to Chloe and was _fully_  aware of how fragile Chloe probably felt right now. She relied on the idea that Chloe trusted Beca and would know that she had a legitimate reason for leaving her side so suddenly. Beca hadn't succeeded in convincing herself of this thought.

Whilst Chloe was hurt that Beca so hurriedly avoided being seen with her, she respected whatever reason Beca had for doing so. "Hey Beca, Red" Fat Amy greeted them, not in the least bit surprised that Chloe was in their room. She did a double take at Chloe. "Woah, Chloe you don't look so hot, what's wrong?"

Chloe smiled at the blonde, thankful for her concern. "Gee thanks Amy" she teased, before continuing, "Yeah me and Tom broke up. I caught him cheating."

Amy raised her eyebrows for a moment, before scowling. "I hope you kicked his ass, Red" 

Chloe held up her still very painful, possibly broken hand, and said "No, but I'm 99% sure I broke his nose" she giggled and high fived Amy.   
  
"Oh Beca, I just saw Jesse, he said you skipped out on meeting him earlier or something?" Amy questioned, her eyes focusing on the brunette who was still stacking CDs with much more attention that necessary. Then it hit. Jesse. Of course it had been easy to forget about him when Beca's mouth had been against hers and her hands had been all over her and suddenly Chloe felt sick because this was wrong, it was so so wrong and she had to escape this situation before she fucked up any more.

"Illleaveyouguystoitseeyoulater" the words tumbled out of Chloe's mouth at the speed of light and she was down the attic stairs and slamming her bedroom door before either Amy or Beca could say a word.

Beca hated herself. For putting Chloe through this...for forgetting about Jesse...for kissing Chloe when she was supposed to be with Jesse...for leaving Chloe's side so abruptly...for everything. Her eyes had followed Chloe and now was staring at the empty stairs.

"Earth and Beca...?" Amy said teasing the brunette. Beca cleared her throat and looked up at the blonde.

"Sorry, Amy...thanks...yeah, I was exhausted and so decided to cancel on him. Did he seem very upset?" Beca asked, not being able to stop thinking about how her behavior was coming across to Chloe right now.

"Nah he wasn't upset, he just wondered if you were okay." Amy replied, her eyes still lingering on where Chloe had hurriedly exited. "Red still seemed a little upset though, don't you think? Maybe you should go and check on her."

Beca took a few seconds to respond with a blink and a look in Amy's direction. "Er...yeah...of course, see you later Ames." Beca bent to pick up Chloe's plate with her half a cupcake on and placed her own half on Chloe's plate and started down the stairs…

In her room, Chloe was pacing. She didn't know what she was feeling; anger, at herself, for forgetting about Jesse, at Beca for kissing her without a care in the world when she had a fucking boyfriend, for being no better than Tom in that respect. She felt the unwavering sensation of guilt settle in the pit of her stomach, making her sway uneasily. She heard someone approach her door and she rounded on it, crossing her arms as she waited for it to open.

Beca wanted to turn back the clock, back to when Chloe kissed her and to stop it. The feeling in her stomach made her want to throw up. She stood outside Chloe's door and knocked three slow knocks. Her face grimacing at all that had happened tonight. She waited for Chloe to open the door, when a good 20 seconds passed without a sound from the other side Beca bent down and placed the cupcake at the base of the door. She was about to stand when the door whipped open and Chloe's feet came into view.

"Get in here." The redhead hissed, in a low voice, not wanting to alert the other Bellas that were milling around the house that anything was wrong. "And shut the fucking door." The fact that Chloe rarely swore, unless she was beyond angry scared the hell out of Beca. She straightened up, following Chloe into her room and shutting the door behind her. No sooner had the latch clicked into place, came Chloe's voice. "I can't fucking believe you."

Beca was still facing the door as Chloe started. She was a coward, she thought. She kept her back to Chloe for a few seconds before turning around to face the redhead. Beca was instantly hit with a fresh wave of guilt at the sight of Chloe. The redhead was stood with her arms crossed and wide, puffy eyes glaring back at her. Beca felt awful that she had caused these feelings in Chloe. She opened her mouth to protest, wanting to point out that Chloe had kissed her first and that she loved Chloe but she realised that excuses would cause more anger to build in the redhead. The brunette kept quiet and listened to Chloe, tears forming behind her eyes.

Chloe wanted to yell. She wanted to scream, and shout and cry so she was surprised when her voice came out deadly calm. "Why didn't you stop me?" she asked, tears glistening in her pale blue eyes.

Beca was taken aback by the calmness in Chloe's voice. She felt truly ashamed that it hadn't even occurred to her to stop Chloe earlier. "Chlo, I.." Her voice came out weak and broken, she stopped to clear her throat. "I'm sorry...I didn't even think, I didn't want it to stop..." She admitted honestly. Beca stared down at her feet as she prepared herself for whatever Chloe had to say to her. She knew now that they could never be together, she'd never seen Chloe this angry before and she knew she'd crossed a line. She'd fucked everything up...again.

Chloe sat down on the bed, making no indication for Beca to join her. She needed to think, to try and make sense of Beca's words and thought process. Beca loved Chloe, she'd said so herself. But Beca was with Jesse. But then Chloe had been with Tom when she never loved him. But Chloe had never kissed anyone whilst she was with him. But then the only person she wanted to kiss was Beca, who was with Jesse. Chloe gripped either side of her head, trying to calm her thoughts, slow them down. After composing herself for a moment, she figured out what she was trying to say. "What do you want Beca, honestly?"

"You!" Beca replied without a second thought. She didn't move closer to Chloe, she clearly wanted her own space. "I'm so sorry..." Beca said quietly, looking at Chloe. Beca knew now that what she was doing was more than unfair to Jesse, she made the decision to tell Jesse the truth. She knew that Chloe still wouldn’t want her but she didn't want to lie to Jesse anymore than she had already. Beca reached into her pocket and took her phone out, dialing Jesse's number.

After four rings, he picked up. "Hello?"

"Hi Jess, you okay?"

"Yeah, missing you though!" Jesse replied, causing Beca to feel another pang of guilt.

"Yeah, sorry about cancelling on you earlier...um I was just wondering if you could drop by the house later today? I need to talk to you about something..?" Beca asked and paused for Jesse to respond to her request.

"Yeah I guess so? Everything okay?" He asked, his voice full of concern.

"Erm...not really, sorry for being vague, I just...I need to talk to you in person..." Beca chastised herself for not being able to do anything right.

"Oh.. okay. I'll drop by after I've finished at the station then? Gotta run, I'm late as it is and you know how Luke is, right Becky?" He laughed, "Anyways, I'll catch you later, love you!"

"Yeah, okay that's fine...thank you" Beca paused while she thought about whether to return the affection especially considering that Chloe was listening intently on this conversation. "See you then!" She continued and hung up the phone. Silence fell between the pair as Beca put her phone back in her pocket.

"What are you doing Beca?" Chloe asked, her eyes wide and her features bordering on panicked. Beca couldn't be breaking up with Jesse, not for her. Jesse was kind, and sweet and had his life together and Chloe was broken. Beca needed Jesse and his stability, not Chloe's mess of an existence to cope with. She couldn't let this happen, even if it killed her inside.

"Me and Jesse...we're done. I can't be with him knowing how I feel about you" Beca replied in a deadpan tone. "Don't blame yourself, Chlo, this shit-show is entirely my fault...I'm just sorry for all of the pain I've caused you..." Beca continued before glancing at the door, "Do you want me to go?" The brunette asked pointing at the door.

"No" the word spilled from Chloe's lips before her brain even registered Beca had asked her a question. Once the question settled in her mind, Chloe answered again, her voice barely audible, "Please don't go."

Beca paused. 'Okay, so she wants me to stay' Beca told herself. 'That's good' she thought. She stood awkwardly by the door not sure whether Chloe would want Beca to come any closer, the redhead still looked pretty angry and emotional.

Realising Beca was waiting her to say or do something, Chloe stood up. She closed the gap between the two of them almost instantly, til her hands were at Beca's waist and their faces were mere centimetres apart. Chloe leaned in, her lips just barely brushing against Beca's as she whispered "Tell me to stop"

Beca felt Chloe's lips against her own as she felt Chloe's hands find their way to Beca's hips. Beca's eyes closed as the kiss continued. Beca didn't return the kiss and her eyes flew open a second later and widened. The brunette felt her own hands lift and connect with Chloe's shoulders. She realised she was putting pressure against Chloe. She was pushing Chloe away. Their lips parted and Beca looked in Chloe's eyes sincerely and whispered sadly, "No, Chloe..not yet"

Chloe clung to the fabric of Beca's shirt, refusing to move away from the brunette. "Please Beca" the redhead bit down on her lip, hard, in an attempt to subdue the tears threatening to overflow. She was being selfish, SO selfish, she knew, but she needed Beca, needed her more than words could explain, and she didn't think she could cope with a rejection without stumbling over the edge "Please"

Beca felt conflicted, confused and slightly angry...Chloe had been mad at her for the exact thing she was trying to do right now. 'What the hell?' Beca thought. The brunette didn't know what to do and it was only when her eyes locked onto Chloe's piercing blue orbs did Beca sense the intense desperation about the older girl. Beca, being stubborn, didn't kiss her on the lips but instead placed her lips against the side of Chloe's jaw, just touching her neck. She whispered into the redhead's ear, "Please, just wait a little longer..." She kissed Chloe on the cheek while simultaneously loosening the grip Chloe had on Beca's shirt.

Chloe nodded faintly. She let her fingers still drift up and down Beca's sides as she breathed for a moment before she swallowed "Yeah.. yeah you- you need to talk to Jesse, I'm sorry" she trailed off faintly, her gaze focused on the floor, unable to look at Beca as embarrassment burned in her cheeks.

Beca's heart ached for Chloe. It killed her to pull away from their kiss but she knew it was the right decision...after a series of wrong decisions. She placed a hand on Chloe's cheek and gently nudged the redhead's chin up. Stroking her cheek bone with her thumb, Beca smiled before pulling the taller girl in for an embrace, "Thank you, Chloe" she whispered into Chloe's shoulder.

Chloe breathed into the brunette's hair, trying to draw as much of Beca in as she could before they had to break apart. She let Beca go, stepping back and smiling gently at her. "You're killing me, Mitchell."

Beca chuckled, relieved that Chloe had relaxed somewhat. "Believe me, this is killing me too" Beca reassured the redhead. Their fingers stayed locked together until both of their arms were outstretched. Then Chloe took another step back and the contact was broken. Beca couldn't help but just smile at Chloe. She knew now that there was no question about what she wanted. 'Chloe Beale' she told herself.

Chloe smiled back at Beca, a little unsure of what to say. She could still feel the warmth of Beca's hands in hers and the lingering feeling made her feel a strange mixture of sadness and hope. "You should go and wait for Jesse." She said softly, honestly needing a moment alone after the hectic events of the day.

Beca nodded slightly and smiled simply. "If you're sure..?" Beca asked. When Chloe nodded in response, Beca turned to open the door and left after looking back to make eye contact with Chloe again. As the door clicked closed, Beca sighed, feeling utterly shit about the mess she'd made of things, anxiety grew in the pit of her stomach and made it's way to her chest. She felt like she was going to throw up.

Chloe sat back on her bed, putting her head in her hands. 'What have I got myself into' she said to herself, letting herself fall back against the pillows as a knot twisted in her stomach as she waited for Beca.


	6. Breaking Up and Making Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one's a shortie, next chapter will be longer I promise!

Meanwhile, Jesse walked down the path towards the Bella house, wondering what on earth Beca needed to talk to him so urgently about. He strode up to the front door, knocking 3 times against the hardwood.

The unmistakable knocks came just as Beca reached the bottom of the stairs. "Oh shit..." Beca said to herself under her breath as heat rushed to her face. She moved over to the door and after a few seconds of hesitation, pulled the door open with a genuine smile. "Hi Jesse, thanks for coming so quickly" she greeted him.

"You sounded pretty urgent on the phone so I thought I best come as soon as I could" He replied easily, following Beca through the house as she led him to the kitchen, indicating for him to sit down. "So what's up?"

Beca honestly had no idea how to start this conversation, she hadn't even had a chance to plan any of it in her mind. As Jesse took a seat Beca scooted to the fridge. "You want a drink?" The brunette asked, trying to stall for as long as possible.  
  
Jesse shrugged, "Sure, hit me" After Beca had slid a beer across the table to him, she sat down opposite him, which was the first thing to make him think something was wrong. "What's this about Bec?"  
  
Beca couldn't look Jesse in the eyes, instead she focused her gaze onto her own hands on the counter top. Her voice came out barely a whisper, "I'm so sorry..." Jesse's face slowly formed a sad expression. "Sorry for what, Bec?" He slid a hand into one of Beca's. Beca froze at his touch. His hand was warm and familiar but it didn't cause tingles up and down her body like Chloe's did, it didn't make her heart ache for more, it just felt nice. Beca gripped onto his hand as tears formed behind her eyes. "I don't know how to say this...gently so I'm just gonna say it..." For the first time since Jesse had entered the house, Beca allowed their gazes to meet. She breathed slowly and deeply before she continued. "I can't do this anymore..." She gestured back and forth between the pair of them, "I'm so sorry...I've realised that I've been in love with someone else for a while now..." The first of the tears overflowed onto Beca's cheeks and she paused for Jesse to process what she was telling him. Her knuckles had turned white with the strength of the grip she had on his hand.  
  
Jesse swallowed harshly. He knew it. He fucking knew it. But he'd be lying if he said he hadn't already prepared himself for this day. Beca had been increasingly distant with him after the second ICCA finals, the first one that she and Chloe has won, as captains together. It hurt, but Beca meant a lot to him and he wasn't a total asshole so he simply nodded. One question still burned in his mind and he figured that he might as well ask. "It's Chloe" he said, chuckling slightly at the way his question came out like it was fact.  
  
Beca was grateful for Jesse's calm reaction but her body tensed at Jesse's revelation. "How did yo--"

"C'mon...you don't think I never noticed the way you look at her..?" Jesse cut Beca off with a slight smile. He loved Beca and this was breaking his heart but he loved Beca enough to know that if she's happier with Chloe than with him, he understood and would allow Beca to live her life with whoever she wanted.

Beca relaxed her face into a sad smile and nodded, "Oh...I'm sorry..." Her face immediately tensed and went into full on sobs, as in Kim-Kardashian-crying-face sobbing. She brought her hand to her face to hide her features and she gripped onto Jesse's hand. "I'm--so--sor-ry...I ha--hate-myse-elf-f-for this..." She choked out through tears and sharp breaths in. Beca's shoulders were moving up and down as her sobs continued but got quieter.  
  
It's okay Beca, really" he said, rubbing her shoulder gently.

The brunette shook her head with her head lowered. "No...It rea-lly is-n't..." Another wave of tears shook through her small frame as the words tumbled out of her before her brain could register them. "Ikissedher..." Her eyes widened at the revelation as she the words echoed through her mind.

Jesse froze. "You kissed her?" he asked, after a pause, his voice low, his expression unreadable.

Beca didn't dare lift her head to meet Jesse's eyes. She just nodded silently.

Jesse took in a shallow breath, considering Beca's words carefully. "Look Becs, I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt and that I don't still love you. And the fact that you kissed her..." Jesse shook his head silently, at a complete loss for words. "But I'd also be lying if I said that I hadn't seen it coming about 10 miles off. I'm not gonna try and force you to stay with me Beca, if you love Chloe then you have my blessing to go for it, on one condition.”

  
Beca's body relaxed and the sobs subsided as a grin grew across her face. "Really? Thank you! I...I...I can't believe you're being so cool about this!" Beca responded, thoroughly surprised. She paused as she realised what Jesse had said, "Wait...on what condition?" She asked him.  
  
“That you're still gonna be my best friend" Jesse said quietly. "’Cause I don't think I could deal with losing that"  
  
Beca stood up from the counter and rounded it until she was stood next to Jesse. She leant over his shoulders in an embrace. "Of course..." She replied contently.  
  
Jesse nodded, leaning into Beca's embrace. After a moment, he stood abruptly. "Right well, I'm gonna get absolutely wasted with Benji" He laughed, but this time it was genuine. "I'll talk to you tomorrow Becs." His eyes flitted upwards, indicating he was about to talk about a certain redhead who's bedroom happened to be right above them. "Good luck, I mean that. I'll see myself out!"  
  
"Thank you! Talk to you tomorrow!" Beca called after the boy as he turned to leave the house. He waved goodbye just before he exited the kitchen. After a few seconds, Beca heard the front door close and she instantly started moving towards the door. As she reached the bottom of the stairs her walking turned into a small sprint until she was outside Chloe's door again. She counted to ten before knocking as calmly as she could...which still sounded very clumsy to Beca.


	7. Happy Tears

Chloe whipped the door open so fast she thought her arm might fall off and she came face to face with Beca. Her breath quickened slightly at the sight of her and she could feel her heart pounding in her chest, harder than ever. She tried to read Beca's face for an indication as to what happened, she'd purposely _not_  listened to _that_  conversation, but the brunette's face remained blank. "So?" She asked breathlessly, her face becoming slightly flushed as her continued to stare at Beca.  
  
Beca could do one of three things here. One: she could rush up to Chloe, plant a passionate kiss on her lips and leave that grand gesture to do the talking, two: she could sit Chloe down, tell her calming and ask her what she wants to do or three: she could have a little fun... Fun! Beca moved past Chloe and sat on the edge of the bed...feigning a look of disappointment. "Oh Chloe..." Beca was risking upsetting Chloe even more but she knew the end result would leave the biggest smile on the redheads face.  
  
Chloe's stomach dropped. Whatever had happened, it was bad. She moved to sit beside Beca, making sure she was still a safe distance away, putting a hand on the brunette's shoulder and rubbing her thumb in small circles supportively. "What happened?"  
  
Beca leaned forward and shook her head,"I just don't know what to do, Chlo..." She felt the redheads hand leave her shoulder and it was taking everything inside her not to move closer to Chloe. She continued after she stood up and moved in front of Chloe. "I mean, you're gonna have to put up with me for a bit longer..." She allowed her face to form a smile and waited for the penny to drop for the redhead.  
  
Chloe reached her hand up to take Beca's when the brunette's words sunk in and her jaw dropped. "Y-y-you" She stammered, "Acabitch" she used the hand she raised to slap Beca's arm lightly. "I can't believe y- you know what I need to kiss you too much to be mad" She said as she breathlessly grabbed the brunette's shirt, pulling her forwards with urgency.  
  
Beca's eyes closed as she smiled into the kiss, deepening it. 'Finally..! Finally they could be together without a worry about boyfriends or what the other one wanted, they could just...be!' Beca laid back and Chloe followed her movements, keeping the contact between them. Beca's hands found Chloe's waist and she lifted them up and round to Chloe's lower back, pulling her closer still. Beca arched her head back as Chloe moved her lips to the brunette's neck. Beca could feel Chloe's hands tangling in her hair.  
  
Chloe smiled into Beca's neck, enjoying the way the younger girl's breath hitched as she sucked on her pulse point, scraping her teeth ever so slightly over the skin there. Testing the waters, she bit down on Beca's neck, causing the brunette to gasp, before blushing furiously at the noise that had unwittingly left her mouse. Chloe pulled back to smirk at Beca, in an attempt to appear sultry, but the flush of Beca's cheeks caused Chloe to giggled, her laughter only intensifying when Beca scowled, obviously becoming more embarrassed.  
  
Beca was embarrassed at the totally not badass sound she just made and scowled at Chloe who was laughing. "You are completely adorable" Beca told the redhead mid-giggle. "Hey..." Beca started as se traced patterns up and down Chloe's arm. "I've got a question for you..?"  
  
Chloe raised her eyebrows in curiosity, "You can ask me anything, any time Becs" she said, with a small smile. She rolled off Beca, settling down to lie next to her, her hand resting on Beca's hip, her fingers tapping lightly against the brunette's skin.  
  
Beca smiled at the redhead's words and snuggled down closer to Chloe. Without warning, Beca asked the question. "Chloe, will you be my girlfriend?" Beca felt the gentle tapping against her skin from the redhead stop as the question was aired.  
  
Chloe's entire body froze. Did she want to be Beca's girlfriend? Yes. Did she want Beca to be hers and only hers, and to fall asleep with her at night, to make her breakfast in the morning and all the other stuff girlfriends did for each other? Of course she did. But Chloe was scared, so scared; of getting hurt, of somehow fucking up and ruining everything. She trusted Beca more than anything, but whenever she touched her, she couldn't shake the ghost of Tom's hands against her body and the thought had her on edge in an instant. Beca noticed the sudden change in Chloe's demeanour, waving her hand in front of Chloe's face to see if the redhead had spaced out. Chloe blinked rapidly and Beca's face came back into focus and she realised she was looking at her answer. Because Beca was her answer to any problem, Beca could get her through anything. She knew Beca would understand when she eventually plucked up the courage to speak about personal boundaries. So after a pause that was slightly too long, Chloe smiled, a wide bright smile. "Yes"  
  
The long pause had started to worry Beca...had that been too forward? Was it too soon? Had Chloe somehow changed her mind in the last ten seconds or so? As soon as Chloe said yes, Beca relaxed and smiled. "Good, you were starting to scare me there, Chlo." Beca giggled and winked at...her new girlfriend. She leant upwards and kissed Chloe quickly but firmly on the lips.  
  
Chloe returned the kiss, her hand tangling itself in the hair at the back of Beca's head to hold her there for just a moment longer, before pulling back and clearing her throat. "I _am_  scared Becs" she whispered, her eyes wide as she stared into Beca's.

Beca brought Chloe's face close so their foreheads touched. "You don't have to be" Beca whispered reassuring Chloe. "I..." Beca took a breath before pulling Chloe back but keeping her hands on the redhead's cheeks, she wanted to say this while staring into those gorgeous blue eyes of hers. "I love you..." Beca said simply before smiling sweetly.  
  
Chloe's eyes widened. It suddenly occurred to her that even after being with Tom for nearly 2 years, she'd never been told those words and been able to see that they were meant. Suddenly overcome with emotion, she couldn't stop the tears filling her eyes. "I love you t-" she started, before she unwittingly sobbed, although the she was smiling widely.  
  
Beca smiled as Chloe attempted to return the affection. She let out a small laugh at the emotion pouring out of her frie--girlfriend. Beca grinned at the though and she used her thumbs to wipe away the tears streaming down Chloe's face. "Aw...hey...hey..." Beca whispered. She placed a gentle kiss on Chloe's forehead before coming down to meet her eyes again. "I love you more than anything else in the world." she told Chloe, tears of pure happiness rolling down her own cheeks that were high due to the grin on her face.  
  
"Who knew Beca Mitchell could cry?" Chloe teased, poking Beca's hip. She pulled herself closer, resting her head against Beca's shoulder, sighing contemptibly as she listened to Beca's breathing. After a moment, she turned her head to look up at Beca, "Hey Beca?" she asked quietly.  
  
Beca's grin widened. "Hey, I don't cry for just anyone!" she whispered into Chloe's ear. "Yes, baby?" she asked, squeezing Chloe affectionately.  
  
"I'm flattered" She replied softly, her tone still teasing. She paused for a moment before continuing. "I meant it when I said I was scared Becs. I don't... “She paused, trying to figure out the right words for what she was feeling. She tried again, deciding complete and total honesty was the right way forward. "Tom fucked me up. Like, really fucked me up and I can't... I'm not saying you would, but I can't...Not again..."  
  
Beca's heart sank at the deep sadness she could sense in Chloe's voice, the brunette’s eyebrows raised in sympathy. “Hey…” She took Chloe's hands gently and made sure to maintain eye contact with the redhead. “Hey…” she repeated softly. “You don't have to do anything you don't want to do, okay? I’m here for you, I'll always be here for you…” she paused to give the next two words a bigger impact, “I promise”. After a few seconds of silence, Beca continued. “Do you know what the one thing is that makes me truly happy? In this entire world?” Beca asked her girlfriend, still holding her hands.  
  
Chloe nodded gratefully, thankful that Beca was being so sweet and understanding. Her question however, confused Chloe and the redhead raised one eyebrow in confusion as she replied. "Music?" She guessed, not quite following Beca's thought process.  
  
Beca let out a small laugh which caused her to lower her head. She lifted her head again and met Chloe's eyes. "Of course that's important... But no, the one thing in this entire world that makes me happy...is you being happy. As long as you're okay, I'm okay." Beca said honestly.  
  
Chloe felt her eyes begin to water again and she cursed herself inwardly for being so sentimental. She pulled Beca closer to her, desperate to feel as much of the brunette as she could, as she replied, in a whisper. "I'm okay as long as I'm with you"  
  
"That works for me" the brunette replied smiling into Chloe's hair as the older girl pressed her body up against her. Beca smiled, she felt like this was the most perfect moment she could ever hope for. She decided they both needed to relax but had no idea what to do. Pulling away from Chloe, Beca asked her, "Hey...you wanna do something? What should we do?"  
  
Chloe paused for a moment, before a grin spread across her features like wildfire. "Do you trust me?" Chloe asked, with a playful smile. When Beca nodded, Chloe's smile only widened and she replied "Good.  Because I have the perfect idea"  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder what Chloe's got planned...


	8. Jack Daniels and a Tequila Shot

An hour later and Chloe was pulling Beca through the doors of a popular karaoke bar in the city, a place she and Aubrey used to frequent whenever the blonde became too stressed and in turn, too overbearing on the Bellas. "Hey Chloe!" the bartender called to her, recognising her over the crowds of people. She waved back, and on Beca's questioning look of "How the hell does he know your name?’ she shrugged and said "I'm a popular girl" with a wink.  
  
Beca grinned, overjoyed at the improvement in Chloe's mood. "Well, what can I say, I have good taste" Beca winked back, holding Chloe's hand as the pair approached the bar.  
  
"You do indeed Mitchell" Chloe replied teasingly, squeezing Beca's hand gently.

The bartender from earlier came over and greeted them again. "Hey Chloe. Hey Chloe's friend. What can I get for you?"

Chloe smiled and looked expectantly at Beca, who ordered herself a Jack Daniels and Coke, before Chloe spoke "I'll have my usual! You got any free spots?" She asked, gesturing towards the stage where a young woman was currently murdering "My Heart Will Go On".

The man nodded, "Next one's yours if you want it!" Chloe grinned excitedly, nodding. "Okay, write me your song choice and a dedication if you want and you can head up when Whitney over there's done" he joked.

Chloe turned away from Beca, hiding her choices from her, and before Beca had time to pout, the bartender had returned with their drinks: A JD and Coke and-

"Your usual is a tequila shot?!" Beca choked, laughing uncontrollably.

Chloe shrugged, necking the shot, before replying "I need some confidence before singing, speaking of-" She looked over her shoulder to see a man beckoning her to the stage. "I'll see you in a bit" she said, pulling Beca close to kiss her. She pulled away, following the man with the clipboard as the bartender announced through a megaphone.

"Next on we have the lovely Chloe, with a song dedicated to Tom!"  
  
Beca's smile weakened at the name. She trusted Chloe and if this was how she was going to unleash her feelings, she had to just let her get on with it. She gripped her drink, full of nerves, anticipating her girlfriend's song choice. Beca looked around, trying to take in her surroundings before Chloe's song started.  
  
Chloe stood comfortably on the stage, waiting for the backing track to be played. She caught Beca's eye as the opening bars of the song played and she winked as she started to sing. "I remember when we broke up, the first time, saying this is it I've had enough and like, we hadn't seen each other in a month when you, said you needed space" The redhead giggled as the crowd shouted back the backing vocals of "What?!" Feeling already better, she carried on "Then you come around again and say "Baby, I miss you and I swear I'm gonna change, trust me." Remember how that lasted for a day? I say, "I hate you," we break up, you call me, "I love you.""  
  
Beca smiled and winked back at Chloe. She was entranced by Chloe's voice. Soft and melodic which just the right amount of kick for this song. She sipped her drink as Chloe continued. She looked in her element, happier than she'd seen the redhead in months. "Woooo!" Beca cheered. She wolf whistled feeling an intense sense of pride bubbling up in her chest.  
  
Chloe heard Beca cheered from the crowd and missed a few lyrics due to the uncontrollable giggling it caused. "This time, I'm telling you, I'm telling you: We are never ever ever, getting back together! We are never ever ever getting back together! You go talk to your friends, talk to my friends, talk to me! But we, are never ever ever getting back together!" She shot a deliberate wink towards Beca "Like, ever!"  
  
Beca stood, clapping along to the beat, cheering more. She grinned when Chloe forgot some of the lyrics. "You go baby!" she exclaimed loudly over the music.  
  
Chloe laughed again, Beca's outburst causing her to mess up again. She quickly flipped Beca off lovingly. "-picking fights, and me falling for it screaming that I'm right and you would hide away and find your piece of mind, with some indie record that's much cooler than mine." She rolled her eyes exaggeratedly, lacing her voice with sarcasm at the last line. "We called it off again last night, this time I'm telling you, I'm telling you: We are never ever ever getting back together! We are never ever ever getting back together! You go talk to your friends, talk to my friends, talk to me, but we are never ever ever getting back together!" The music slowed and Chloe swayed with it, rolling her hips in a way she knew would have Beca's cheeks flushing. "I used to think that we were forever, ever and I used to say: never say never... And he calls me up and he's like-" Chloe put on her best imitation of Toms voice "'I still love you' and I'm like this is exhausting, like we are never getting back together, like ever. No! We are never ever ever getting back together, we are never ever ever getting back together, you go talk to your friends, talk to my friends, talk to me. But we are never ever ever ever getting back together!" Chloe grinned widely as the crowd erupted in applause and she took a small bow. She strolled off the side of the stage and walked towards where she knew Beca was stood.  
  
Beca was stood waiting for Chloe to reach her. She grinned widely when she saw the redhead bounding along the room to meet her. Beca held out her arms and cheered again. "That..." Beca started as she picked Chloe up as she came into contact with the brunette and spun her round, placing her back down on the ground gently. "Was....incredible!" She finished before passionately kissing Chloe on the lips. "Now..." She said while pulling Chloe to a nearby table and gesturing for her to sit. "I'll get us a couple more drinks, I'll be back in a moment." Beca grinned to Chloe who was nodding as she moved away to the bar.

"Hi Chloe's friend! What can I get you?" The bartender from earlier asked.

"Hi, the name's Beca by the way, and I'll have another JD and Coke and another tequila shot, thanks! We're just over there!" Beca pointed over to Chloe before handing over the necessary coins to the bartender. Beca made her way back over towards their table. "So" She said sitting down opposite Chloe. "You come here often then?" Beca asked smiling.  
  
Chloe rolled her eyes, laughing in her signature melodic tone. "You're such a dork, anybody ever tell you that?" she asked, shaking her head slightly with amusement. She slid her hand across the table, intertwining her fingers with Beca's, enjoying how easily they fit together; Tom had huge hands and Chloe always felt slightly drowned by them whenever he held them, but Beca's hand fit hers just right.  
  
Beca smiled thinking about all the times when Jesse called her a dork, the memories now had a sad tone to them. Beca felt her throat choke up with emotional but decided that it was her and Chloe's night and there was no room for sadness. She cleared her throat and smiled again. "Hey...but I'm a cute dork, right?" Beca asked before pulling a silly face. Chloe erupted into giggles and nodded furiously. Beca squeezed the redhead's hand while looking into those piercing blue eyes. "You're beautiful..." She whispered, almost out of nowhere. She gave Chloe's hand another squeeze.  
  
Chloe leaned forward, trying to wipe the mischievous grin that was threatening to appear from her face. "Beca..." She whispered, using the most sincere tone she could muster. "I know I am" she couldn't hold back the giggles that followed, which were only intensified by Beca's indignant expression. Chloe leaned across the table, her hands twisting into Beca's hair as she pulled her into a long, lust filled kiss. As they pulled apart, Chloe smiled brightly and said "You're beautiful too Becs  
  
Beca squeezed Chloe's hands in hers, they were soft and warm and Beca didn't want to ever let go. Just then a waitress came over with their drinks and set them down on the table. "Thanks!" Beca said to the girl brightly. "So..." Beca started, "what do you want to do about telling the rest of the Bella's about us?" Beca asked before taking a sip of her drink while keeping Chloe's hand in her other hand.  
  
Chloe mused for a second, mulling over her options: they could keep their relationship a secret from their friends and then what? Lie to them? Sneak around in their own home? No, Chloe wanted to be able to hold Beca's hand as she forced her to join in with their weekly movie night, she wanted to be able to kiss her in the kitchen as they made coffee in the morning. But she had no idea what Beca wanted and that made her nervous. She necked her shot. "I want to tell them"  
  
Beca noted that Chloe had downed her shot before replying. She knew that meant the redhead was nervous to know what Beca thought. It made Beca feel good when she realised she could read Chloe like that. Beca sighed in content and smiled. "Okay." She said simply. The truth was that Beca did want the others to know, they were more family than she'd ever had and she wanted them to know the very important fact that Chloe Beale was her girlfriend. She also knew that had Chloe said she wanted to hold back telling them, Beca would have been okay with that, 'whatever makes you happy' Beca thought to herself, smiling.  
  
"Are you sure? That this is okay?" Chloe asked, becoming suddenly extremely unsure of herself. She wanted, needed for Beca to be on the same page, to make sure she was 100% okay with any decisions Chloe made, because knowing Beca, should would just agree with Chloe and end up retreating back into the Beca she knew from freshman year. And as endearing as Freshman Beca was, her Beca was so much more.  
  
Beca immediately sensed the sudden tension in Chloe, the change in body language. Beca moved her drink out of the way and gripped Chloe's other hand so she was holding both of the redhead's hands. "Chloe, I haven't been sure of a lot of things in my life, recently and in the past but if there's one thing I'm certain of it's that I want this to work." Beca smiled and nodded reassuringly. "Look, I'm happy doing whatever makes you happy, telling them or not, I'll support you, either way." Beca winked, lovingly at Chloe who suddenly looked so much smaller than she had when they entered. Her posture had slackened and she looked much less relaxed than she had a few moments earlier. "Hey...I promise, Chlo." Beca emphasised, stroking her hands with her thumbs.  
  
Chloe nodded again "Okay, I definitely want to tell them. I think I should call Aubrey first though, you know how mad she'd be if they all knew and she didn't." She knew Beca and Aubrey never quite saw completely eye to eye, but she desperately hoped her best friend would support her in this, because she honestly couldn't think of a way she could stand living without either of the pair.  
  
Beca grinned, "You read my mind Chlo...hey, how about we Skype her instead?" Beca said smiling at the tension leaving Chloe's body. "You Skype her on your own, say you have something to tell her and then I'll pop up out of nowhere and kiss you?" Beca paused waiting for Chloe to respond, after a few seconds when Chloe didn't say anything, Beca continued, "Or not...I mean, we can just call her if you want."  
  
Chloe realised she hadn't spoken in a few moments and shook her head, squeezing Beca's hand supportively. "No, no I want you there love! It’s just... I never actually told Aubrey that I’m not exactly straight and I think that needs a pretty long conversation... But I wouldn't have it any other way than with you right next to me" Chloe smiled brightly, tilting her head as she watched Beca for her response.  
  
Beca thought about Chloe's thought, 'Oh yeah!' Beca hadn't even thought about that aspect of their situation, Beca had discovered and come to terms with her own sexuality years ago, she didn't even think about what Chloe's been though regarding her sexuality. Beca cursed herself for being so insensitive. "Oh, God, yeah of course! I'm sorry, I didn't think about that." Beca returned the squeeze of Chloe's hand and smiled, "So, are we Skyping her then? You wanna do it tonight?" Beca asked.  
  
Chloe shook her head endearingly "Don't be silly, you don't have to apologise. Yes, tonight." The redhead beamed at her girlfriend, her heart-warming at the idea that soon, they could be a proper couple, without any hitches or complications.  
  
Beca downed the last of her drink before placing it back down on the table firmly, “Okay, sure thing... you ready to go?” Beca asked standing up. Their hands parted as Beca checked under the table masking sure they hadn't left anything under there.  
  
"Ohhhhh no no not so fast Mitchell" Chloe grinned, lurching over the table to pull Beca back into her seat. At Beca's puzzled depression, Chloe's eyes flittered towards the stage. "You think I'd take you to a karaoke bar and let you leave without singing? Not a chance. Now get your ass up there!" the redhead winked.  
  
  
Beca’s face formed a smile and she rolled her eyes at Chloe jokingly. Chloe was looking at her with those adorable, gorgeous puppy-dog eyes. “How can I say no to that face!?” Beca said, kissing Chloe on the forehead as she skipped over to the man beside the stage.  
  
“Hey, I guess you're the person to talk to about performing?” Beca asked the guy.

“That would be me, yeah…?” Beca stared frowning before she realised that he was asking her name.

“Oh! I'm Beca...Chloe’s…” Beca stopped herself, she didn't want to ’out’ Chloe to anyone without her permission. “...I'm here with Chloe” Beca finished waving to the redhead.

“Ah, yes, well, write your song down and a dedication if you want and there's a spot free in about 3 spots time, I’ll come and get you!” He said handing her a bit of paper and a pen. She scrawled the words down and handed the paper back. “Thanks, I'll see you in a few minutes!” He said before Beca turned to return to Chloe at their table.  
  
"So, what did you pick to sing?" Chloe asked, smiling sweetly as she slid Beca a tequila shot across the table. Beca raised an eyebrow and Chloe's smile widened. "It's for luck" she teased, winking obviously at the brunette.  
  
Beca caught the shit and lifted it while giving Chloe an uncertain look. The redhead was returning a wide smile. Beca shrugged and down the shot quickly before pulling an involuntarily undignified face at the sharp taste. "Oh, God Chloe, why would you let me drink that?!" The brunette exclaimed half smiling, half wincing as she tried to get over the intense flavour. "Anyway...you'll see!" Beca said winking again as she took her seat.  
  
"It’s tequila Becs, not cyanide" Chloe chided lovingly. Deciding it would be fun to mess with Beca a little before her performance, Chloe stood up and sat herself down on the brunette's lap. Before Beca could protest (not that she would've), Chloe's lips were on hers. Pulling away slightly, Chloe ran her tongue along Beca's bottom lip, chuckling to herself as the brunette shuddered. "Besides,” She whispered, her voice thick with lust, her lips dropping to plant a light kiss below Beca's ear "It tastes nice".  
  
Chloe was on Beca's lap and kissing her before the brunette could react. She relaxed back on the chair as Chloe kissed her neck, allowing her hands to wrap around Chloe's waist. Beca closed her eyes listening to the sounds of the room. She felt free, happy and lucky, oh so very lucky to be here right now, with Chloe Beale. Beca lifted one of her hands to Chloe's back to ensure the redhead didn't lean too far back and fall off. She pulled Chloe closer and hugged her. It was almost as if Chloe belonged in her arms, like the pair were meant for each other in some larger way than just as a couple. 'This is paradise' the brunette thought to herself.  
  
Chloe felt like she could stay there forever, held in Beca's arm. That dream, was promptly shattered as the young guy with the clipboard cleared his throat uncomfortably and said "Uhh. Beca? You're up!"  
  
Beca's eyes opened and with a sense of disappointment that she had to stop the embrace with Chloe she waved to the guy to let him know she was coming. “See you in a few moments!” Beca called as she left for the stage. “And now, welcome to the stage, Beca! With a song for a special someone in the crowd!” he finished reading the card out and clapped as the first few bars of the song started playing. Beca brought the microphone up to her mouth and said, “You know who you are” as she winked at Chloe. Beca closed her eyes, immersing herself in the music. “I think the universe is on my side, Heaven and Earth have finally aligned, days are good and that's the way it should be…” her eyes opened as she started smiling directly at Chloe thinking about how perfectly the lyrics summed up her feelings about them finally being together.  
  
Chloe couldn't help but giggle as Beca said "You know who you are", blushing furiously at the wink that followed. As Beca started to sing, Chloe felt her heartstrings tug as she felt every ounce of meaning Beca poured into it, watching intently as Beca lost herself in the music. That was something, Chloe thought, she would never get tired of: Seeing Beca completely immerse herself in something she loved so deeply. The redhead didn't recognise the song, so she made sure to listen carefully to the lyrics, knowing Beca chose them for a reason.  
  
“You sprinkle stardust on my pillow case” Beca winked on the word ‘you’ as she smiled into the next line, “It's like a moonbeam brushed across my face, nights are good and that's the way it should be” Beca felt her heart in her throat as the words came out and threatened to cause her to cry (with happiness, of course). She hoped the meaning of her wanting to spend many nights in the future with Chloe was clear to the redhead. Her free hand absentmindedly gestured to the beat of the words as she sang.  
  
  
Chloe couldn't take her eyes off of Beca. The redhead was mesmerised by everything the brunette did; the way she moved with the music, the way her voice shook with emotion, the way her eyes remained locked on hers Chloe's the entire time. She couldn't look away.  
  
Beca winked again as the music grew louder with the next few lines. “You make me sing oooooh, la, la, la” Beca pointed at Chloe smiling. “You make a girl go ooooh...I'm in love... love” Beca blew a kiss towards Chloe after the second ‘love’. Beca moved to the edge of the stage, getting as close as she could to Chloe in the crowd below. “Did you see that shooting star tonight?” Beca was definitely only singing to Chloe at this point. She pointed up at the ceiling, theatrically acting out each line of the chorus with a dorky side smile on her face. “Were you dazzled by the same constellation?” Her hand came out in front of her as if she was really asking Chloe and she put on a face that said ‘did you?’ with the next line, “Did you and Jupiter conspire to get me?” She smiled, her eyes closing again and moving to the centre of the stage again, completely in sync to the song as the chorus continued, “I think you and the Moon and Neptune got it right” she opened her eyes and gazing directly into Chloe's eyes as the chorus ended, “Cause now I'm shining bright, so bright...bright, so bright.”  
  
Chloe didn't notice the tears running down her face until she tasted salt on her lips. Not bothering the wipe away her tears, she let her smile grow as she continued to watch Beca. She made a mental note to ask for the name of the song she was singing because Chloe would be damned if she didn't listen to it on repeat for the next month.  
  
Beca moved to the centre of the stage, slowing her movements to the quiet sound of the verse, closing her eyes. “And I see colours in a different way…” Beca placed a hand on her chest with the honestly of those words, hoping it would be apparent to Chloe. She opened her eyes again and looked purposely at Chloe for the next line of song. “You make what doesn't matter fade to grey...life is good and that's the way it should be…” Beca missed the beginning of the next line because she was staring at Chloe for a second too long and it caused her mind to blank. “...ing oh, la, la, la...you make a girl go oh oh...I'm in love, love…” Beca sat down on the edge of the stage as the repeat of the chorus started again…”Did you see that shooting star tonight?” She repeated the acting along with the words she had done before but more subtly, this time her mind completely with the words and her eyes closed “Were you dazzled by the same constellation? Did you and Jupiter conspire to get me? I think you and the Moon and Neptune got it right. Cause now I'm shining bright...so bright…” she opened her eyes purposely for the next line, “And I get lost... in your eyes”. This continued throughout the last repeat of the chorus. “Did you see that shooting star tonight? Were you dazzled by the same constellation? Did you and Jupiter conspire to get me? I think you and the Moon and Neptune got it right. I think you and the Moon and Neptune got it right. I think you and the Moon and Neptune got it right… Cause now I'm shining bright, so bright...bright, so bright, bright, so bright…” Beca stood for the last line of the song, holding out her hand in Chloe's direction. “And I get lost in your eyes tonight…” the song ended to an eruption of applause, cheers and people screaming Beca's name in encouragement from the crowd. Beca grinned as she realised her cheeks were sticky with tears, when that had happened, she had no idea. She bowed before waving to the crowd and leaving off the side of the stage to reach Chloe.  
  
Chloe was full on sobbing by the end of the song and she silently cursed herself for being so goddamn emotional. The redhead couldn't grab Beca fast enough as she practically pulled her offstage and into one of her signature Chloe Beale bone crushing hugs. She sobbed into Beca's shoulder, although they were happy tears. Happy that she knew, she knew for definite that Beca loved her just as much as she loved Beca. "I love you" she whispered, her face still buried in Beca's neck.  
  
Beca just held onto Chloe, tears of joy rolling down her cheeks. She breathed in the scent of the taller girl’s hair as she lifted Chloe and spun her round just like before and placed her on the side of the stage. "I love you too" she whispered with their foreheads touching.  
  
"Kiss me Mitchell" Chloe whispered breathlessly, the tear tracks still visible on her flushed cheeks as she repeated the words she'd said in her bedroom back in the Bella house, her arms always wrapped around the back of Beca's neck, hands threading through her dark hair.  
  
Beca leaned into a deep passionate kiss, the longest they'd had so far. She placed a hand either side of Chloe's face gently, slowly moving one to the back of her head, letting her fingers get tangled in the redhead's hair. Beca nudged Chloe's knees to the side so she could get closer to her, pressing her body up against Chloe's.  
  
Chloe gasped into Beca's mouth, all inhibitions gone as she kissed the brunette back, harder than before, pulling Beca closer, closer, closer until- "Shit sorry ladies!"  
  
 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder what just happened...


	9. The Calm Before The Storm

Chloe tried not to laugh, she really, honest to god, did. But the image of Beca, doused in ice water after some poor waiter tripped over some wires leading to the stage and consequently upended his tray all over the brunette, was priceless. So shocked by what just happened, Beca didn't even notice Chloe snapping a picture of her livid expression until the flash went off.  
  
Beca just stood there, shivering, freezing. “Really?!” She screamed angrily at the waiter before taking a deep breath and trying again, “I'm sorry, I just--this is freezing…!” She turned back to face Chloe, “I'll let you keep that photo, but no more please.” She smiled at her girlfriend. “Can we go?” Beca asked, angrier about the fact that the pair had been interrupted than anything else.  
  
"C’mon then babe" Chloe laughed, holding out her hand for Beca to take. She led the brunette into the parking lot where thankfully, there was already a row of taxis waiting. "Barden University please!" Chloe said brightly as she sat down, a less pleased Beca following behind her, looking decidedly miserable. To cheer her up, Chloe leaned over so her lips were right next to Beca's ear. "Don't look so unhappy" She whispered, her hand resting on Beca's thigh. "That waiter just gave me an excuse to get your clothes off" The redhead heard Beca's breathe hitch and she promptly removed her hand and sat back up straight, throwing a wink to the other girl, who looked more frustrated than ever, making Chloe's grin widen.  
  
Beca felt her cheeks heat up with embarrassment. “Of course it had to fall on me!” She laughed, “Although I'd much rather that than have it fall on you!” Beca said smiling and taking Chloe's hand in her own. The brunette let her head fall back against the headrest, suddenly exhausted. She slid her head across to rest on Chloe's shoulder and closed her eyes. “I had a great time tonight…” she said sleepily.  
  
"I'm glad. I had a great time too" Chloe replied softly, wrapping her arm around Beca's shoulder. "Do you still wanna talk to Aubrey when we're home or are you too tired?" She asked, her voice laced with concern.  
  
Beca's eyes opened at the concern in her girlfriend's voice. She lifted her head to look at Chloe, "Just let me change into some dry clothes and then I'll be happy to do whatever you want to do" she kissed Chloe's cheek before placing her head back down on Chloe's shoulder.  
  
"I'll help" Chloe smirked, before laughing at her own boldness. The cab pulled up outside Barden and Chloe paid the fare, despite Beca's protests. Just as they reached the front door, Chloe grabbed Beca, spinning her to face her, "Once we're inside we have to act like friends for the time being." Beca nodded slowly, unsure where Chloe was going, "So this, will have to do until we've talked to Aubrey" she said breathlessly, before crashing her mouth against Beca's.  
  
Beca closed her eyes, deepening the kiss for a moment before pulling away, it killed her but it was worth it to see the cute pouty Chloe made at the sudden loss of contact. "Okay...you ready?" Beca turned and entered the house, holding the door open for Chloe.  
  
"As I'll ever be" Chloe chuckled. As soon as she stepped through the door, a pair of arms had been flung around her.

"I heard about you and Tom, I'm so sorry!" She realised the arms, and voice belonged to Emily and she pulled away to smile at the younger girl.

"It's okay, Em, he was an asshole. I'm okay". She looked over Emily's shoulder to see Beca making her way upstairs and after several more hugs from her fellow Bellas and more insisting that she was fine, Chloe finally managed to get away, practically bolting up the stairs and into her room, where she found Beca, in distinctly dryer clothes, waiting on her bed.  
  
Beca had laid down after a few minutes of waiting and was slowly drifting off to sleep when Chloe opened the door. She opened her eyes drowsily. “I thought you'd never come up!” The brunette chuckled as she propped herself up onto her elbows.  
  
"I got hugs from everyone, I had to battle my way out!" Chloe laughed softly. "Did I wake you? I'm sorry" she frowned as she perched on the edge of the bed, next to where Beca was laying, absentmindedly running her fingers through the brunette's hair as she spoke.  
  
"They're a great bunch, aren't they?" Beca said before turning towards Chloe and resting her head on Chloe's lap. "Everyone here loves you, Chlo, I hope you know that." Beca said, closing her eyes.  
  
Chloe smiled downed at Beca, shaking her head slowly. "I'm just here Becs, I'm not special." she contradicted softly, her fingers still running through the brunette's hair.  
  
Beca stayed in the same position and kept her eyes closed but frowned. “Oi!” Beca responded lightly, “Don't say that, you're special to me…” Beca said honestly. It broke Beca a little bit inside every time she heard Chloe put herself down like that, it honestly broke her.  
  
Chloe lifted Beca's head, crawling into bed beside the brunette, turning on her side to face her. She brushed strands of hair off Beca's face as she replied quietly, "It's true though Becs, I'm just plain old Chloe. They'd all do the same for anyone, I'm not important"  
  
Beca had moved closer to Chloe but when she heard the words escape Chloe's mouth she opened her eyes and moved away, onto her front and up on her elbows looking at Chloe, frowning. "Are you kidding me, Chlo? Those girls downstairs, care about you, deeply. And I love you! Please, it kills me to hear you say you're not important, you don't think you're important? Okay...." Beca sat up next to Chloe, it was her turn to run her fingers through the redhead's hair. "You're the first thought that pops into my mind when I wake up, the thing that I fall asleep thinking about, that I dream about, that keeps me up other nights. If I see something funny or cool I always find myself thinking, 'Chloe would like that' or 'I can't wait to tell Chloe' “Beca paused to breath. “I promise you. You. Are. Important." Beca felt a wave of emotional and felt suddenly hot at everything she had just said to Chloe, she'd spilled her heart out.  
  
Chloe nodded, unable to find words to reply to Beca. It occurred to Chloe that she hadn't really ever been told that before; because Aubrey and the others never thought she needed to hear it and well... Tom wasn't exactly Prince Charming. She didn't realise she was crying again til she felt Beca's thumbs on her cheeks, wiping away at the tears as she soothed, "Hey, what's wrong? You okay?"  
  
"Oh, baby..." Beca's eyebrows raised in concern as she pulled Chloe closer and started swaying back and forth to calm Chloe down. "You're okay, shhh. It's okay…baby" Beca whispered in Chloe's ear lovingly.  
  
"Can I tell you something Becs?" Chloe asked in a small, shaky voice. The tears had stopped, but the redhead still felt like she could fall apart at any moment. "Of course you can baby" Beca replied. Chloe nodded, clearing her throat before saying softly "Whenever you say something nice about me, I never know if you're lying or not. .. And not because I think you're a liar Becs, I don't mean it like that, it's just sometimes I can't... tell what's real and what's just bullshit _he_  told me"  
  
Tears threatened to escape Beca's eyes as she listened to the honesty and vulnerability in Chloe's voice. “Every time I say something nice? Of course I mean it... I swear…” Beca stroked Chloe cheeks. “I swear...I swear on my music career!” Beca finished. “Look, if I ever see him again, he's dead” Beca said entirely seriously. She moved to look at Chloe's hand which was still pretty red but the swelling had calmed. “How's your hand feeling?” The brunette asked.  
  
"Sore, I think I'm gonna have one hell of a bruise" Chloe chuckled, resting her head on Beca as she slowly stroked her thumbs over the redhead's knuckles. They lay in comfortable silence for a while until Chloe wrapped an arm over Beca's waist and said softly "Aubrey and the girls can wait, let's sleep."  
  
Beca held Chloe's sore hand in both hands and kissed each knuckle softly. "You sure?" Beca asked moving down to lay next to Chloe. She placed an arm over the older girl’s waist and kept hold of Chloe's sore hand in her other.  
  
Chloe nodded "Mmhmm" she said softly, already drifting to sleep in Beca's arms. Chloe couldn't recall a time she felt safer and she revelled in the feeling of Beca holding her, sighing contentedly as she fell to sleep.  
  
Beca smiled at the drowsy tone of Chloe's voice. "Okay." She said knowing that Chloe was already asleep, she loved this girl more than anything else in the world and it destroyed her to think that that fucking Tom had caused so much doubt and pain in her mind. The brunette moved some strands of hair out of Chloe's face and watched as the redhead's breathing calmed to a steady pace. She laid her head down, entranced by Chloe's perfect features. "I love you Chloe, I'll always be here, always." She whispered to Chloe who she thought was fast asleep before gently placing a kiss on the older girl's forehead and closing her own eyes to drift off to sleep.  



	10. Nightmares

Chloe woke up to an empty bed. Frowning she drowsily looked around her bedroom in search of- Suddenly the door flew open and in strode "Tom?!"  
  
"Hey Chlo, Aubrey let me in" He smiled charmingly and Chloe's stomach turned.

 "Where's Beca?" The redhead asked, extremely disorientated. The man's smile faltered and his face grew angry.

"Everything's about fucking Beca with you isn't it?" He moved towards her and she scrambled out of bed, backing away towards the wall. "Are you fucking her? Is that it?" He asked, his tone livid as he stood far too closely to her. The side of his fist struck the wall beside her head. "Fucking answer me!" Chloe remained frozen, she couldn't speak, she couldn't run, all she could do was watch as Tom's hand closed around her throat. "You're a liar Chloe." He said darkly, as the redhead gasped for breath. "You're a fucking liar and nobody will ever love you. Not like m-"  
  
"Chloe! Chloe wake up!"  
  
Beca had woken to the redhead’s muffled screams of pain, she took a few seconds to figure out what was going on and once she had she was wide awake, holding Chloe. “Chloe! Chloe wake up!” She said loudly giving Chloe a gentle but urgent shake. The redhead's body was sticky with sweat and her face wet with tears. “Hey...hey...hey...it's okay! It was a just a nightmare...he's not here...I'm here...I'm here Chloe! Me, Beca, I'm right here!” The brunette tried to assure Chloe who was sobbing into Beca’s chest and gripping tightly onto Beca's top. “It's okay…” Beca whispered into Chloe's hair. “You're okay, you're safe...calm your breathing babe.” Beca said quietly after the redhead began hyperventilating and irregular sharp sounds started coming from her. Beca kissed her on the head, stroking her hair and her back… “You’re okay…” she repeated.  
  
After the intense panic had subsided and Chloe's breathing had becoming slightly more regular, the tension left her shoulders and she relaxed slightly into Beca. "Shit...” She said breathlessly, wiping her face and running a hand through her hair. "I’m sorry"  
  
  
"Hey..." Beca said softly as she wiped Chloe's tears away. "Don't be silly..." Beca whispered, "There’s no need to apologise..." Beca smiled down at Chloe and kissed her forehead again, rubbing her back in circular motions soothingly.  
  
Chloe laughed shakily, feeling much better. She sat up, flexing her joints and feeling the satisfying crack of her shoulders. She wiped her face again and smiled at the brunette. "Thanks Becs... Uh... What d- What did I say exactly?"  
  
Beca breathed slowly at the question. "Well...yo--you said 'no' a few times and er...'stop it'..." The brunette's voice wavered with tears. "You called out my name too..." Beca looked down, "What was it about...?" She asked half knowing-half not wanting to know. She then raised her head again before adding suddenly, "I mean, you don't have to say if it's too painful..." Beca squeezed Chloe's hand gently.  
  
Chloe shook her head, feeling much calmer and safer. She was with Beca, she was okay. "No, it's okay... I dreamt I was still with Tom and I- I asked for you and he got..." Chloe trailed off, swallowing harshly. "Angry." she scoffed. "I'm okay though." She added, returning the squeeze of her hand.  
  
Selfishly, Beca felt a small flutter of joy in her chest at the thought that Chloe had thought about Beca but the brunette just smiled and said, “No, you're not, you're amazing.” Beca winked before kissing Chloe on the lips slowly and full of love.  
  
Chloe kissed the brunette back for a moment before pulling back to pointedly roll her eyes at Beca. "You are such a dork. An amazing dork, but still a dork" She smiled softly. "Let me wash up and then we can Skype Aubrey, yeah?"  
  
Beca smiled and flopped back on the bed, "Okay, Red, I'll be here...waiting" she teased as she threw another wink in Chloe's direction.  
  
"May I remind you you're in _my_  room Mitchell" Chloe joked, and when Beca made no sign of moving, she pulled the brunette up with both arms. "You can wait for me" she said softly, her fingers trailed along Beca's collar bone and up the curve of her neck. "Outside." she said, quickly lifting her fingers away, using the hand to point towards the door.  
  
Beca's smile turned into a sad pout and she feigned disappointment as she followed the direction of the redhead's point lazily across the room. As she reached the door she turned her head to face Chloe and traced a single tear track down one cheek before rushing back over so she was directly in front of Chloe. She kissed the older girl deeply, passionately and didn't break contact for a good 10 seconds. Beca made sure to be the one to pull away first and grinned when she saw Chloe frozen there with her eyes still closed. "Later, Red!" Beca called as she promptly left the room and headed upstairs to change into fresh clothes.  
  
With her eyes still closed, Chloe muttered "Asshole", before grinning to herself. She went and sat down in front of her mirror, groaning at the mess that was her face. She set to work, moisturising and priming her face before applying her foundation. After twenty minutes and a slight mishap with some liquid eyeliner, she smiled in the mirror, much more content with her appearance. She quickly stripped, throwing last night's clothes into the wash basket at the foot of her bed before pulling open her wardrobe. Eventually she decided on some simple black high waisted jeans and a cropped burgundy vest top. She ran a brush through her tousled red hair, rechecking the mirror before sauntering up to Beca's room.  
  
As Beca entered her room, she let out a huge breath and felt relieved that Amy was still downstairs. She pulled out a plain black T-shirt from the wardrobe and swapped it for the one she was wearing before adding a dark green checked shirt. She ran her hands through her hair lazily and lifted her laptop open on the bed ready to Skype Aubrey. She changed into another pair of black jeans before heading into the on suite and quickly brushing her teeth. She came out a few minutes later and opened Aubrey's profile on the laptop. She heard footsteps coming closer up the stairs and smiled, waiting for Chloe.  
  
"Knock knock" Chloe said brightly as she practically skipped into Beca's room. She was almost vibrating with a mixture of nervous energy and excitement as she sat down next to Beca, her fingers tapping absently mindedly against her knee. Looking to the laptop screen, before looking back at Beca she said. "You ready?"  
  
After gazing at the laptop screen in a trance Beca blinked and looked up at Chloe. "Yep" she said standing and kissing Chloe on the cheek. "Don't worry, Aubrey will be cool about it. You look good by the way" Beca added while gesturing for Chloe to sit down on the bed.  
  
Chloe's cheeks flushed at the compliment and she sat down beside Beca, crossing her legs and wrapping her arm around Beca's lower back. "Thanks, you look good too babe" She replied. Taking a deep breath, she pressed the call button, intently watching the screen until Aubrey's face came into view.

"Hey guys! It's so good to see your faces again" The blonde smiled, as she waved through the screen.

Chloe smiled and waved back, "It's good to see you too Bree, I got a hell of a lot to tell you..."  
  
“Hey Bree!” Beca added with a smile.

“Hey, Becs!” The blonde replied, “Ooh is there some juicy Bella gossip I don't know about?” The brunette and the redhead exchanged a look to which Aubrey exclaimed, “What? I'm allowed to be a little nosy!” With hands held on a mock surrender.  
  
Chloe smiled knowingly, her eyes flitting sideways towards Beca again. "Not exactly Bree, no. Uh... So Tom and I have separated. I caught him cheating." She started, deciding to give Aubrey time to process each piece of information individually, hoping to not overload the blonde and cause some sort of meltdown. She didn’t want a repeat of _that_  particular ICCA Final.  
  
The blonde hesitated before responding, "Oh, I’m, sorry...Chlo...can I be honest?" Aubrey asked cautiously. Aubrey was apologising because that what she thought was the accepted thing to do in this situation, but she was honestly pleased that Chloe had gotten herself out of that toxic relationship.  
  
"You can always be honest with me Bree" Chloe said, absentmindedly rubbing Beca's hip off-screen. "I never wanna be anything but honest with you"  
  
Aubrey looked fit to burst and when Chloe said that, she let a huge breath out. "Good, Chloe, I'm happy for you! Honestly, that guy was a dick, I'm glad you guys are over." Aubrey smiled supportively at the pair.  
  
"I'm glad too" The redhead smiled, and pulled her arm back from around Beca to hold it up to the camera. "I think I broke his nose" She laughed, before her expression grew more serious. "That's not the only thing I had to tell you though, Bree"  
  
Aubrey came closer to inspect the reddened hand as best she could, "I should hope so! Shit, Chloe!" She exclaimed before sitting further back from the screen. "Okay, what's up?" She asked.  
  
"Hurts like a bitch but Amy told me he has two black eyes so" Chloe shrugged, still grinned. 'See how he likes it' Chloe thought to herself, before shaking the thought from her mind. She cleared her throat and took a deep breath "Okay so I'm not really sure how to say this, so I'm just gonna come out with I-" Chloe was interrupted by Beca snorting with laughter at the obvious mischoice of words and Chloe glared briefly at the brunette before continuing. "I like girls."  
  
Based off the expression on Aubrey's face, it took her a while to really hear the words. Aubrey had always really known that Chloe wasn't exactly straight, or suspected it at least but she always told herself to wait for Chloe to initiate any conversation. After a few seconds of silence, Aubrey decided on the best response she could think of. "Okay, that's cool, how are the rest of the Bella's" she asked sincerely, her smile grinning at how Chloe was grinning back at her.  
  
Chloe couldn't have been happier. Aubrey's response was perfect and gave her the confidence she needed to take that final step and tell her about her and Beca becoming an item. "They're good! Amy's still "secretly" dating Bumper but what she doesn't realise is that Stacie made a fake Instagram to follow Bumper's private account and we see all their disgustingly adorable selfies." Chloe laughed, "But uhh, yeah they're all good, Beca especially..." Chloe trailed off, smirking at the brunette.  
  
Aubrey's mouth opened in surprise, "Oh, my god you have to send these photos!" Aubrey said with glee. "And, oh yeah, why? Has something happened Beca..?" Aubrey grinned excitedly.  
  
Chloe giggled "Of course I will! And uhh, well you could say that...” the redhead grinned and instinctively shifted closer to Beca.  
  
Aubrey visibly frowned and gestures between the pair... "Wait...Are you two...?" the blonde started before trailing off.  
  
Chloe looked down, unable to contain her smile. "Uhh... You could say that..." She said quietly, not meeting the blonde's gaze.  
  
"Really!?" the blonde asked quickly not letting on how she really felt about that. She wanted to make sure that she was hearing what she thought she was hearing. "You two are together?" Aubrey asked again.  
  
Chloe felt sick. Aubrey wasn't exactly jumping for joy, in fact, her face wasn't showing any emotion whatsoever and that scared Chloe more than everything. Aubrey had an opinion on literally everything and the fact that her face was completely stoic was almost worse than the famous meltdown of senior year. "Yeah..." She said slowly, trying to gauge the blonde’s reaction.  
  
Aubrey over-theatrically sighed and lent back in her chair. " _Finally_!" she screamed at the screen in joy, her hands coming up into view, her face sporting the biggest, widest grin. "You have no idea how long I've waited for this! I just wanna squeeze you both!" the blonde said affectionately. "So...tell me everything!" she continued leaning close to the screen.  
  
Chloe's face went through several emotional changes within a few seconds: Sadness, Confusion, Shock, even more confusion, and after the penny dropped (partially due to Beca nudging her, grinning), her face became overcome with glee. "Bree! You scared me! Don't do that to me again" Chloe pouted, acting even more put out as Aubrey and Beca laughed with each other. "Well there isn't much to tell, I broke up with Tom and then Beca confessed her undying love to me" The redhead joked, unable to stop smiling.  
  
Beca softly hit Chloe on the knee along with a brief glare before grinning back at Aubrey. "Yep, that's...exactly what happened!" Beca giggled again looking round to lock eyes with Chloe. She lent in for a kiss and softly brought their lips together. Squeals of joy and excitement came from the computer. "That's it! I'm coming out to see you guys as soon as I can!" Aubrey exclaimed with a wide smile.  
  
Chloe pulled away sharply, leaving Beca with a frown. "Oh my god yes! Please come and visit soon! I miss your hugs." Chloe said, her voice saddening slightly.  
  
Aubrey smiled wider, "I miss you too Chlo, and all of you!" she replied. There was a few seconds silence before Beca spoke, "What about my hugs...?" Beca asked with big puppy-dog eyes and the smallest, quietest, cutest voice Chloe had ever heard. A loud " _Awwwwww!_ " came from the laptop speakers as Chloe wrapped her arms around Beca instantly.  
  
Hugging her tightly, Chloe whispered in Beca's ear "Not even close Mitchell" she said as she pulled away with a wink, earning a light punch to the arm from Beca, which in turn caused Chloe to freeze, her eyes wide.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh shit Beca.


	11. Finding Out

Beca's eyes grew wide and panic-stricken. Her hands came up to stroke the place where she had lightly hit Chloe, trembling slightly. "I'm so sorry, I didn't think, I..." Beca started whispered as she pulled the redhead in for an embrace. She could sense the lack of reponse from Chloe and stroked the back of her head and kissed her temple, whispering more apologises. Aubrey was silent, and very confused as to what had happened to her friend. One second, Chloe was grinning like mad, the next she looked as if someone had knocked the wind out of her lungs.  
  
"Chloe, are you okay?" Aubrey asked, moving forward towards her screen. Her mind tried to process what had happened, what had caused Chloe to react so violently to essentially nothing. She went through the interaction step by step, trying to pinpoint the moment Chloe's demeanour changed: They talked about Aubrey visiting, Beca was adorable, Chloe hugged Beca and whispered to her, Beca acted offended and p- Realization hit Aubrey like a shit ton of bricks as the pieces started to fit together in her mind, tracing all the way back to...Tom. "Beca..." Aubrey said warningly, as she watched her rub Chloe's back.  
  
The brunette was holding back tears as she turned to face the screen giving Aubrey a knowing look as she sniffled back tears. Aubrey's face fell as her fears were confirmed by Beca's face. "Comfort her, and call me later, okay?" Aubrey said firmly and quietly. Beca nodded, her voice breaking as tears escaped her eyes, "Will do..." Aubrey waved before ending the call to which Beca closed her laptop and turned her attention back to Chloe who was gripping Beca's shirt tightly in her fingers.  
  
Chloe tried to calm herself down, she really did. But all she could focus on was Tom and she felt like she would throw up any second. HIS hands, HIS voice telling her she wasn't good enough. She couldn't breathe, she couldn't think, 'Focus Beale. You can get through this.' She counted breaths in her head and slowly, she tuned back into Beca's voice and her breathing returned to normal.  
  
Beca lifted Chloe's head so her eyes met her own. She was faced with a blank expression on the older girls face. "Hey..." Beca whispered. "I'm so sorry...baby...I love you, I can't believe I..." the words were pouring out of Beca before she registered what she was saying…

Chloe nodded quickly, cutting Beca off. "It's okay, it's okay" She took a deep breath, making sure to count the seconds, a trick Aubrey taught her for calming performance nerves, before speaking again. "I'm okay... I'm sorry I scared you, I know you were joking. Its okay"  She repeated, trying to reassure Beca that she wasn't angry.

Beca's eyebrows raised in a mixture of sadness and relief. "I'm so sorry..." She repeated as she raised her hands up to cup Chloe's face. She brought the redhead closer, kissed her on the forehead and rested her chin on the older girls head.

"It's okay" Chloe repeated softly, sighing as she felt her heart rate and breathing return to normal. "I love you too" She murmured when she realised she hadn't returned Beca's sentiment. "Fuck..." she sighed, forcing herself to carry on taking deep breaths to remain calm.

Beca allowed a small smile to appear on her face at Chloe's return of affection and she rubbed Chloe's back supportively. "Hey, take as long as you need...okay?" She said softly before kissing the top of her head. "I love you more" she whispered.

"God, what's Aubrey gonna think?" Chloe groaned, putting her head in her hands. She felt stupid for reacting so much to something so silly and she still felt the familiar burn of shame in her stomach as she thought about her best friend finding out about the reasons behind it.

Beca felt an internal feeling of sympathy raise up in her chest. "I think...she...could figure it out to a certain degree...I'm going to call her about it later, she asked me to...Don't worry, she won't..." Beca's speech was interrupted by her own thoughts about what Chloe would be feeling. She continued "Baby? You need to know... There is nothing you should be ashamed of, nothing."

Chloe laughed darkly, it sounded bitter and harsh and it made Beca wince. "Then why do I feel so fucking awful?" She asked, her voice level and calm. The evenness of Chloe's voice unnerved Beca and she could tell it meant the redhead was beyond upset.

Beca didn't know the answer to that question and she didn't want to say the wrong thing either so she settled for reassurance, sincere reassurance. "It's not your fault...none of it...at all...in any way...shape...or form...I promise...it isn't." The brunette kept adding ways to say the same thing until she saw a glimmer of a smile on Chloe's face. She nuzzled her face close to Chloe's before whispering, "At all" and kissing her nose lightly. Chloe giggled at that and Beca relaxed visibly.

Chloe became more relaxed and after the brunette kissed her nose, Chloe seized her opportunity and wrapped her arms around Beca, tackling her to the bed as she pecked her lips.

Beca felt herself being pushed back on the bed, Chloe's lips on hers, Chloe's hands on her waist. Beca fought back against the pressure and deepened the kiss, bringing her hands up to tangle themselves in Chloe's hair.

Chloe was intoxicated by Beca, everything about her had Chloe's head spinning and her heart reeling and despite initiating the kiss, she had to pull back to catch her breath. "You amaze me" the redhead said breathlessly, gazing into Beca's deep blue eyes.

Beca grinned as she pressed her lips back against Chloe's. Her heart racing and breathing increasing. Nothing else mattered, in these precious moments, it was just them, Beca and Chloe, finally. She flipped Chloe over so the brunette was on top. She planted a kiss on her redhead's neck as she breathed out, “You're incredible, Red.”

"Fuck... Becs" Chloe managed to choke out, before she cut herself off with a gasp as Beca sucked a hickey onto her neck that Chloe would definitely not be happy about later. She ran her fingers through the brunette's hair, she pulled her head up so she could stare into Beca's eyes. "Kiss me " she whispered, her voice shaking with want.

She didn't have to be asked, or rather told, twice and Beca crashed her lips against Chloe's as she pressed her body against the redhead slowly but firmly. The desperate actions of the brunette changed to gentle care over where she put her hands and how she hovered over Chloe. "I love you" Beca whispered between kisses. She cursed herself at how many times she had told Chloe that she loved her tonight. Of course, she meant it with every fibre of her body and she wanted Chloe to know but she also wanted to keep those 3 words for special times where they'd have a bigger impact.

"Never stop saying that" Chloe husked, as she felt the brunette's lips trail down her neck and along her jawline. Chloe didn't think she'd ever be tired of hearing those three precious words, it was a rarity for them to leave Tom's mouth and if and when they did, they were always tainted with an apology for another fuck up on his part. But here, now, Chloe knew wholeheartedly that Beca meant them, more than anything.

Beca giggled through the kisses at how it felt like Chloe had just read her mind. She went against her previous thoughts and said, "I... love... you... so... much... Chloe." Between kisses.

Chloe giggled against Beca's lips and could easily have spent the entire day curled up with the brunette but something was pressing on her mind and she forced herself to pull away. "You should call Aubrey. She'll be worrying, you know her."

Beca sat back, still on top of Chloe. She sighed still feeling the burning absence of Chloe's lips on hers. She knew the redhead was right and leant back down to give Chloe a quick peck on the lips before hopping off her girlfriend and skipping over to the chest of drawers where her phone was resting on top.

Chloe sat herself up, crossing her legs and running a hand through her suitably tousled hair as Beca picked up the phone.

Beca started scrolling through her contacts and got to Aubrey after only a second, she pressed the name but paused before hitting dial. "What if I say the wrong thing?" She asked before lifting her head to meet the older girls eyes. "Wow..." Beca whispered involuntarily.

"You wo- Did you just 'Wow' me, Mitchell?" Chloe teased, enjoying the way Beca's cheeks flushed with mild embarrassment. "You won't say the wrong thing Becs, I trust you.”

Beca studied her phone as if she'd never used it before, "You deserve a wow...You look beautiful" Beca said simply before hitting dial and bringing a finger to her lips in order to cease any teasing Chloe had intended to continue. She threw a wink in Chloe's direction as the phone started ringing.


	12. I'm Okay

"Beca! Finally! Spill, _now!_ " Aubrey was, to say the least, on edge. She had been waiting a good half an hour for Beca's call and every second that had passed without her phone ringing had panicked her even more. She desperately needed to know if her best friend was okay, praying that the conclusion she had made earlier was false and there was just a huge misunderstanding. But the feeling in her gut was telling her otherwise and it scared her.

Beca's heart rate increased at the panic in Aubrey's voice. "Hey Aubrey, sorry this call took so long...Chloe's calmed down now, she's okay at the moment..." Beca said all of this while locking eyes with Chloe, her voice full of sadness. "Look..." her voice caught in her throat and so she cleared it and tried again. "What did yo...what do thin..." Beca didn't know how to word what she was trying to say. 

Aubrey paused for a moment, trying to formulate the words to represent the thoughts she was trying to convey. She swallowed down the bile in her throat and spoke as calmly as she could. "What did he do?" She asked, her voice level, but with an undertone of bitterness, punctuating every word.

Beca screwed her face up as the nausea threatened to overcome her speech. "She...he...ermm" her voice trembled with emotion. "H-he...w-was erm..." Beca broke the eye contact with Chloe as she continued. "He was hitting her and..." Beca trailed off again as she lifted her head to look at Chloe who had brought her legs up to her chest and hiding her face in her knees. Beca reacted immediately and went to sit beside the redhead. She brought her arm up around Chloe's shoulders.  
  
Aubrey unwillingly let out a sob. She was right and normally, normally Aubrey would revel in being correct but this time, oh god had she wished she'd been wrong. She had prayed to any and all Gods that she didn't believe in, that she was wrong. But Beca just confirmed her worst fear and it broke her. Too many thoughts ran through her head: Why didn't she notice? She could've done something! Why didn't Chloe tell her? How did she get through it alone? The blonde's thoughts continued to race as she came to increasingly worse conclusions; If he was hitting her, what else was he doing? She gasped. "Did he... " She started, unable to force the words out of her mouth.  
  
Beca's breathing hitched in her throat as she thought about Aubrey's question. "Did he...what?" Beca asked back as she felt Chloe's body tense under her arm. "What do yo..?" Beca's eyes widened and she felt her heart in her throat as she looked in Chloe's direction.  
  
"Did he force her to...?" Aubrey choked out, unwilling to finish the sentence. She couldn't say it, she was too afraid of the answer. "I mean..."  
  
Beca was silent for a few seconds as she didn't know the answer. She stuttered out, "I don't...I...let me..j-just hold on one second" Beca left the call running but placed the phone down on the bed before Aubrey could reply. The brunette turned her full body towards Chloe and started rubbing her upper back in circular motions. "Chlo..?" she asked softly.  
  
Chloe paused as she felt even more shame filling her. She felt so incredibly stupid, but she knew that Beca and her best friend wouldn't, weren't judging her so she mustered up her courage, swallowed her pride and nodded slowly.  
  
Floods of tears started rolling down Beca's cheeks when she saw the nod. The instant Chloe responded Beca moved to embrace the older girl but stopped herself, immediately unsure of where to put her hands on her. She tentatively placed a hand in the middle of Chloe's back, and whispered, "Oh, Chlo..." Beca instinctively moved her hand to Chloe's leg before checking herself and pulling away.  
  
Chloe bit her lip to stop herself from sobbing. Beca wasn't touching her, no, Beca stopped touching her when she nodded. 'You are such an idiot Chloe' she thought, wishing the ground would swallow her up. Beca thought she was tainted, dirty, disgusting. 'You _are_  disgusting' Tom's voice echoed in her mind and the sob ripped through her frame before she could stop it.  
  
Beca saw red. She honestly wanted to punch the wall, scream, punch Tom, kick Tom, kill Tom. She breathed out slowly, forcing the air out of her lungs. She really didn't have the words she wanted to express her feelings at this moment so she moved closer to Chloe, still careful not to touch her for fear of crossing a line. Her mind was racing with things she could say but deciding none were quite right.  
  
Chloe coughed, getting Beca's attention. "You're still on the phone." She said, her voice stone cold and her face stoic. She couldn't process Beca's rejection, and it was all she could do not to just bolt from the room, or burst into full on tears.

Beca decided that holding hands was safe and so she took Chloe's hand from where it was gripping onto her leg and intertwined their fingers, still sitting a safe distance away. There was no physical response from the redhead. Beca turned to the phone, picked it up, "You still there, Bree?" She asked and was surprised at how calm her voice sounded.

"Of course I'm still here Beca. Please tell me she said no. Please." Aubrey's voice, which was usually so steady and even, shook audibly and she was surprised Beca could even make it out due to the low volume at which it left her mouth. It couldn't be true, she _had_  to have reached the wrong conclusion. Chloe had been seeing this guy for the best part of two years and Aubrey never noticed anything wrong, aside from a few arguments, (and now she thought of it, that 'few' was actually many) which the redhead had insisted were 'nothing'. She had to be wrong, because otherwise she was partially to blame.

"Sh-she...erm..." Beca started but she can't continue so she just said, "I'm so sorry..." Because it was all she could think of. By the sound coming from the phone it became clear that Aubrey knew what that meant and Beca had to hold her breath to stop herself from crying because she knew that would be so fucking selfish. "Please, I'm gonna talk to Chloe, I'll call you later, sorry again" Beca hung up to the sounds of Aubrey's protests and she felt awful for causing so much worry for the blonde but she'd feel worse if she left Chloe alone right now. She threw the phone across the floor, out of reach and turned back to face Chloe. She let their hands separate and whispered "Chlo...I...can't...I’m so..." She stuttered, still at a loss for words.

"Don't." Chloe's tone was curt, cold and uncaring as she practically yanked her hand away from Beca's. "You don't have to apologise" She said, in the same tone, her voice beginning to shake as tears threatened to overflow. She needed to get out of here, away from Beca, because Beca thought she was tainted and oh god, was she right. Chloe had been completely ruined and she needed to leave before Beca's rejection ruined her any more. "I get it" she spoke quickly as she stood up abruptly, desperately trying to remove herself from the situation.

The brunette was confused and hurt at the coldness in Chloe's voice, she stood instinctively as Chloe did. She took back Chloe's hand tentatively. “Hey...you get what…?” She asked as tears overflowed down her cheeks, turning quickly into subdued sobs. She tried to stop, but couldn’t. ‘God dammit, stop being so selfish!’ She scalded herself. In that second, her instinct to be close to Chloe overcame her worry at crossing any physical boundaries and she crashed into Chloe with her arms tight around the taller girl’s shoulders. “I’m so sorry he did this to you, you don’t deserve it, none of it, you’re perfect, I can’t, I can’t, I can’t…” By this point, Beca was hyperventilating uncontrollably and when she remembered that she didn't want to do the wrong thing, she pulled away as she continued to heave and hyperventilate. “I’m sor...sor...sor...ry…” Beca grabbed her chest, she couldn't breath.

It was Chloe's turn to be confused. "Wait, Beca... What? Hey, hey. Sit down" She guided the brunette to sit back on the bed. "Breathe Beca" She said softly, regarding her with extreme concern as she rubbed her back in circles. "Breathe love"

The breathing didn't calm. Beca felt herself being sat back on the bed and the faint sensation of a warm hand on her back but she couldn't hear anything aside from the sound of her strange, irregular breathing. She felt the anxiety in the pit of her stomach grow and spread through every part of her body. She was having a panic attack, the more she thought about the fact that Chloe had been hurt like that and that fucking prick was just walking around without a care in the world only increased her anger and therefore panic. She gripped tightly at the bed sheets beside her as streams of tears ran down her face.

Chloe was freaking out, despite suffering from her own anxiety issues, the only advice she'd ever received was Aubrey's breathing techniques and a quick "Suck it up" from her mom; neither of which would help in this situation. Beca had completely spaced out on her and Chloe had no idea how to help, how to make it better. With shaking fingers, she frantically wiped away Beca's tears and she spoke in a soft, calm voice. "Beca, look at me, hey, look at me" Beca's eyes locked on hers but Chloe wasn't entirely sure the brunette was focusing at all, so acting purely on instinct, she took Beca's hand and placed it over her own heart, letting her feel the thudding in Chloe's chest. "I'm here, I'm okay, you're okay. Just breathe. In-" She breathed in, still holding Beca's hand to her chest, "And out." She continued, her eyes never leaving Beca's.

All the negative emotions under the sun were running through Beca’s mind, anger, fear, sadness, anxiety, confusion, helplessness… she kept thinking of Chloe in the fetal position and Tom’s fucking stupid face and tears and Chloe standing away from her and Chloe crying, Chloe's voice, cold and distant. No, Chloe's voice full of care, love and concern… Beca felt her hand being pulled away from her and then she felt the touch of warm, soft skin, rising and falling along with the words “In...and out…” Her eyes found the familiar, piercing blue and she felt her chest expanding and contracting at a slower pace. Realising her throat was dry, the brunette swallowed hard and blinked. Chloe's voice became clearer and louder and closer. She felt herself coming back into awareness. She kept breathing in and out, using Chloe's chest as a guide of when to breath in and when to breath out.   

Chloe felt Beca come back to her, felt her eyes focus on hers, felt her fingers flex against her skin, and she had never felt relief quite like it. "Hey," She said softly, her head tilting slightly as she watched Beca. "You with me Becs?"

The brunette’s breathing had slowed to a more manageable pace and she recognised that Chloe had asked her a question, “Yeah…” Beca replied quietly. She felt embarrassment fill her cheeks and was certain that her face must be a very dark pink. ‘Crap, well done Mitchell!’ She thought to  herself, ‘have a panic attack next to Chloe after she tells you that she….’ Beca couldn't finish that thought before more tears fell down her cheeks. She wasn't sobbing this time, her face was exhausted and blank but the tears kept coming. “I'm sorry, baby…” Beca whispered. Her eyes fell down to her own hand on Chloe's chest and she pulled it away to hold Chloe's hand, her fingers trembling.

"Good" Chloe smiled softly, still wiping the remnants of Beca's tears from her face. "Hey, hey, stay with me." She murmured as the tears started to fall harder. "You don't have anything to apologise for." Chloe squeezed Beca's hand gently, as she leant forward and lightly kissed away the teardrops still lingering on Beca's cheek.

Beca couldn't make eye contact with Chloe. She looked down at her lap while Chloe kissed her cheek. She felt a new wave of embarrassment and nausea spread through her when she thought about how she’d reacted just now. She hated herself. She hated Tom. She loved Chloe. Chloe shouldn't love her. She was meant to be supporting her and all she could do was have a panic attack. ‘Fucking stupid…’ Beca thought to herself. If she hadn't of had a lapse of judgement and playfully punched Chloe on the shoulder, the redhead wouldn't have freaked, causing the need for Aubrey to be informed of all of facts, in doing so, Beca wouldn't even know that this had happened to Chloe without the blonde asking. Beca hated herself. She didn't even think to ask.

"You're spacing out again" Chloe murmured softly, using her thumb and index finger to tilt Beca's head upwards so Chloe could look at her. "Talk to me, Becs, please" The brunette didn't respond immediately and Chloe followed her plea with a quiet whisper of "I love you."

The brunette blinked rapidly and with every blink, Chloe's face became brighter in her vision and her voice, clearer. "I lo-" the words got caught in Beca's throat and so she cleared it and tried again, this time whispering, "I love you too." Beca rested her head on Chloe's shoulder, and closed her eyes. "And I'm so sorry" she added quietly.

"I know" Chloe murmured in response, stroking Beca's hair, gently. Her chest tightened at the thought that she had caused this, that Beca was so upset because she was worried for her. "You don't have to worry about me though." Chloe added, softly, her voice low. "I'm okay."

 


	13. We Forgot The Door

Beca loved the feeling of Chloe's hand stroking against her hair, soft and careful, but she couldn't let that remark slide. As much as she didn't want to have this conversation, especially not now, Beca knew that it was needed. She lifted her head and moved away from Chloe. "Hey..." Her voice was full of love but came out a little harsher than intended. "Stop it! Look, I know it's not my job to look after you, nor is it my job to worry about you. But I do. And after hearing.... _this_....I'm sorry but I don't think I can believe you when you say that you're okay."

Beca..." Chloe started, not knowing how to proceed, "I'm not gonna pretend it's all 'sunshine and rainbows' but..." She hesitated, deciding on the best way to explain herself. "I don't think about it anymore, not really... When I say I'm okay, I just mean that..." Chloe swallowed, taking a breath before continuing in a much quieter voice. "It doesn't haunt me anymore."

There were no more words or sounds that Beca could make, she just looked at Chloe. In silence. She sighed a sigh that was full of exhaustion and sympathy. She stood up from the bed, not knowing exactly what to do and started pacing the room slowly. "Do you..." She paused, on the other side of the room and turned to face Chloe, "Do you wanna talk about it...?"

"Do _you_?" Chloe asked immediately, moving towards Beca, before hesitantly sitting back down. "You reacted so..." Chloe paused, thinking of the right word. "Vehemently, and then you wouldn't touch me... it felt like..." Chloe trailed off, not wanting to voice her thoughts in fear of their confirmation.

‘Fuck…’ she thought, she’d fucked up again. Beca still wasn't completely aware of how her reaction had affected Chloe but she knew by Chloe's voice that she'd reacted wrongfully. “It felt like…?” Beca encouraged. The brunette made no motion to move towards Chloe, she didn't want to scare her or make things worse.

"I wanted you to hold me Becs and you didn't." Chloe whispered, still unsure of what was going on in the brunette's mind. "That's all I want" She said softly, her eyes never leaving Beca's.

A shaky breath left Beca's lips as her eyes widened and she cursed herself again. Instinctively, Beca moved towards Chloe, arms out. Her legs buckled under the emotion that overcame her and the weight she had unexpectedly put there. Where she had meant to wrap herself around Chloe's torso and kiss her cheek, she ended up gripping around Chloe's waist with her head in Chloe's lap, kneeling on the floor. Muffled sounds of sobs and apologies started coming from Beca as she shoulders shook with emotion.  
  
"Beca wh- Hey, hey, don't cry." concern laced through Chloe's voice as she stroked the brunette's hair and rubbed her back soothingly. She leaned down, pressing a kiss to the back of Beca's head gently. "I'm here." She continued to whisper comforts to Beca, punctuating them with light kisses to her hair. "Please don't cry."  
  
The shaking of the smaller girl's shoulders started to slow. She lifted her head and blinked, wiping her own tears away roughly. Gripping the bedsheets to pull herself up off the ground, she sat next to Chloe and rested her head on the redhead's shoulder. Her breathing was still laboured but a lot calmer now. She moved her hand to hold Chloe's as she spoke softly. "I didn't mean to...I mean, it's not that I...didn't want to hold you...I...I didn't want to cross any boundaries...I..I'm sor...I'm so stupid!" she ended the sentence with harsher tone directed towards herself.  
  
The pieces fit together in Chloe's brain and the redhead let out a soft "Oh..." mostly to herself. Beca had been worried about scaring her, about making her uncomfortable. Chloe almost laughed at the amount of miscommunication that had taken place in such a short space of time but Beca's current state prevented it. "You're not stupid Becs, don't say that" Chloe murmured. "You were being so considerate, that's nothing to apologise for." She turned Beca to look at her. "But... I'm not afraid of you, so please..." She trailed off, leaving her arms open.  
  
At the sight of Chloe's open arms, Beca smiled. She buried her face in the crook of Chloe's shoulder. She brought her hands up to the top of Chloe's back and rubbed softly. She lifted one hand further and massaged the back of Chloe's head with her fingers. "I love you so much Chloe, I can't bear the thought of you in pain..." she whispered into the redhead's ear.  
  
"I'm not in pain when you're here Becky." Chloe said in a small voice, sighing happily as she breathed what was essentially pure Beca, her face, mimicking the brunette's, buried in Beca's hair. She tightened her arms around Beca, her fingers bunching in the fabric of her shirt as she held her.

Beca felt the redhead's grip tighten and she echoed her actions with her arm around Chloe's back. With her other hand she was stroking the back of Chloe's head and she pulled her head back to kiss her girlfriend on the cheek. Her lips lingered there, the brunette completely content with being so close to Chloe.

When Beca began to pull away, Chloe gripped tighter. "Don't you dare, Mitchell" she said quietly, her voice muffled due to her face still being buried in Beca's neck. "I'm not done yet" After a few more moments, Chloe was the one to pull away, apparently satisfied with the duration of their hug. The corner of her mouth pulled into a small smile. "We really ought to work on our communication" She said, before bursting into a fit of giggling.

For a few seconds, the laughter startled Beca, having had the emotional turmoil of the last half an hour, the noise sounded foreign and unfamiliar. When her mind had caught up with itself, she joined in.

They laughed together for what seemed like forever, letting out all the negative emotions from the morning. Eventually it subsided, and Chloe breathed in shakily, feeling slightly lightheaded from all the laughter. "Seriously though, I want to be completely open with you Becs. No more secrets."

The brunette's hand moved to grip Chloe's hand. She breathed in, her body tensing slightly at the phrase. ‘No more secrets’. The words echoed in her mind. Her vision started to blur so she blinked to bring it back into focus. “Of course…” she replied somewhat distractedly with a squeeze of Chloe's hand.

Chloe returned the squeeze of Beca's hand, before taking a deep breath. "There's a reason I find it hard to believe people when they compliment me, and it's not just because of-" Chloe couldn't force herself to say the name, but a quick nod of Beca's head indicated that she was following the redhead's train of thought, so she continued. "Ever since I was a kid, I always that being skinny was better, I mean I grew up in Florida, everybody looks like a god damn super model." Chloe chuckled to herself, however the sound lacked any humour. "And I guess I have a perfectionist personality so, I just wanted to be perfect..." She swallowed, breathing in through her nose and out through her mouth to steady herself. "And I got bullied in high school and it just made me-" Chloe paused, thinking of the right words. "Hate myself. So I got worse and after high school I ended up in the hospital cause I was so ill. That's why I started college late.  Aubrey's the only person who knew, she was basically my only friend in high school" The redhead smiled to herself, before running a hand through her hair. "God, I'm not even sure why I'm telling you this," She chuckled again, pausing for a moment after. "I guess sometimes it's just nice to talk."

“You’re beautiful…” Beca whispered involuntarily. She shook her head and cleared her throat. “No, scratch that, it shouldn't be whispered, it should be screamed but I don't think you’ll thank me for that so I’ll settle for saying it...loudly...to you.” Beca cleared her throat very theatrically and puffed her chest up as if she were about to sing opera. “You…” she gestured to Chloe, “Chloe Elizabeth Beale...are the most beautiful, strong, kind, adorable, talented person in this...entire..world” Beca finished with a smile and a deliberately quick peck to the cheek before throwing a wink in the redhead's direction.

Chloe couldn't help but grin bashfully at Beca's outlandish display of affection, laughing genuinely at the brunette's theatricality and despite the fact that every bone in her body was screaming at her to shake her head and say "I'm not, I'm just Chloe", the sincerity in Beca's voice made her smile widen and instead she replied. "Thank you." There was a comfortable silence between them for a moment before Chloe suddenly frowned. "How the actual frilly hell did you know my middle name?" 

Beca felt her cheeks turn pink. She was ironically embarrassed that she'd remembered that detail. “You erm...told me, one night...and I just remembered…and by the way...thank you for telling me, it means a lot that you were able to tell me." She leaned forward to kiss Chloe on the cheek again.

"Was I drunk? Drunk Chloe shares way too much" Chloe laughed, wrapping her arm around Beca's waist easily, pulling her close. She brought her lips to the brunette's ear. "It's cute that you remembered though" she whispered. She placed a light kiss on Beca's neck before pulling away to lean her head on Beca's shoulder. "Aubrey always said I should tell someone else, someone here, cause sometimes it stills gets hard and she was always there to make sure I was okay, but now she's graduated..." Chloe trailed off, her hand idly tracing patterns up and down Beca's side.

Beca leant her head against Chloe's and stroked the redhead's knee softly with her thumb. “Hey…we can talk whenever you want and about whatever you want.” Beca shifted her position, lifting her arm up to wrap around her shoulder and kissed the redhead on the temple.

Chloe nodded to herself, her mind drifting as she leant into Beca. She wondered to herself how she got so lucky, how in a completely overwhelming turn of events she found herself rid of the man who made her life hell for nearly 2 years and instead, in the arms of her best friend, her best friend who loved Chloe just as much as Chloe loved her. The redhead couldn't keep the grin off her face as she turned to look at Beca. "You're too sweet to me Mitchell"

“That would be impossible...Red” Beca replied, flirtyly as her eyes flickered between the redhead's wide blue lips and her lips. The smaller girl leant in and kissed Chloe on the lips, firmly. “So…” Beca started as she interlocked their fingers together.

When Beca pulled back, Chloe leaned forward, letting her lips barely brush over the brunette's. "So?" She asked, raising one perfectly sculpted eyebrow at Beca, their faces centimetres apart.

Beca rubbed Chloe's hand with her thumb with a squeeze of her hand. "You wanna go downstairs and tell everyone?" Beca kissed Chloe's neck.  
  
Chloe smiled and nodded. "I'd really like that." Beca moved to stand but the redhead pulled her down. "Um.. Becs. You might wanna sort your face out..." Chloe pulled out her phone and opened the camera app, holding it up for Beca to look at, showing the mascara tracks running down her cheeks.  
  
Beca snatched the phone out of Chloe's hand, standing quickly. "Holy shit! Ergh!" she pulled a face of revulsion before handing back the phone. "Okay, give me a few minutes and I'll be right back" Beca moved towards the door.  
  
Chloe giggled at Beca's outburst. "Okiedoke!" She called to the brunette as she dashed hurriedly to the bathroom. Chloe stood up, flexing her joints after being sat down for such a long time, checking her own make up in the mirror. She thanked the Lord for waterproof mascara and primer. After a while, Chloe started to feel uncomfortable being sat alone in Beca's room so she followed her downstairs. As she wandered onto the landing, she found Beca stood outside the bathroom. "Um Chlo... We forgot about the door."


	14. A Bet's a Bet

Chloe's eyes instantly widened before covering her mouth with her hand as her eyes locked onto Beca's. Beca responded by suppressing a fit of giggles. "Oh, my god, Chlo, why didn't you tell me I turned into the freaking Incredible Hulk?" the brunette exclaimed as she examined the damage she had caused.   
  
"I can't believe you broke a door down for me." Chloe shook her head in utter disbelief, smiling to herself. "That's so romantic" she teased, wrapping an arm around Beca's waist, pulling her close to kiss her cheek as they surveyed the damage.   
  
"That's me!" Beca said sweetly while batting her eyelashes in mock innocence. She tapped the end of Chloe's nose affectionately before stepping beside the broken door which was half leaning against the wall and half hanging from its hinges. She stood in front of the mirror and sighed looking at her reflection.   
  
"Let me" Chloe said softly, grabbing a facecloth and running it under the tap. Once the water was warm enough, she lightly began dabbing away at the smeared make up. After a couple of minutes, Chloe stepped away. "There, all done" she said with a grin.   
  
"Your hands are so soft." Beca moved closer to Chloe as she stepped away and moved her hands around the taller girl's waist. "Thanks" she added sleepily as she rested her head on Chloe's shoulder.     
  
"Okay, we're all set to go tell the girls. You ready?" Chloe smiled widely, her fingers intertwining with Beca's, squeezing her hand.   
  
The smaller girl smiled and lead Chloe out of the bathroom with their hands connected. She brought the taller girl's hand around her own waist and continued down the landing.   
  
As they entered the living room, the Bella's were in chaos mode, as per usual. Chloe coughed loudly to grab their attention, arching an eyebrow as she waited for her friends to notice hers and Beca's linked hands.   
  
The volume of the girls didn't quieten and so Chloe threw a look towards Beca, who in turn stepped forward and shouted, "Oi, Pitches!!" When the girls calmed down, Beca looked back to Chloe and smiled.   
  
Stacie was the first to notice the fact the pair were holding hands, letting out a low whistle. "Well played Mitchell" she winked. Chloe laughed and waited for the onslaught of comments from the rest of the Bellas, as, one by one, they all caught on.

Fat Amy was the next one to cotton on, “Yessss” the Australian called out as she came over to the pair and gave each one a giant hug before winking at Beca and nudging her on the shoulder, “told you my Butt Confidence would help you” she whispered before stepping back into the group of girls. Chloe gave Beca a confused look and Beca responded with, “don't worry about it, babe.” With the use of the petname, the group of girls erupted into a chorus of whistles and cheers.

"I don't know why you're cheering Amy, you owe me $50!" Stacie laughed, holding her hand out to the blonde, moving her hand in a "hand it over" motion. Chloe spluttered. "You bet on us getting together?!" Stacie frowned and pretended to act offended. "You wound me Beale. Amy bet ME you were straight."  Both Chloe and Beca turned to Amy, absolutely astounded, and the blonde held her hands up in a mock "don't shoot" gesture.

Beca gave Chloe a comforting squeeze of her hand as she awkwardly giggled at the conversation. "Well...a bet is a bet...Amy, pay up!" Beca said, slightly baffled by the actions of the blonde.

"Fine Conrad." Amy grumbled, walking over the table to grab her purse. "But just remember I KNOW" she finished ominously. The Bellas all looked to Stacie whose face was bright red and avoiding eye contact with all of the girls. Chloe made a mental note to ask Stacie what the hell Amy was talking about later, but for the moment, she saw that her friend was obviously very uncomfortable and decided to turn the attention on to her. Well, her and Beca. She grabbed the brunette forcefully, pressing her lips to Beca's in a fast kiss, that had the Bella's wolf whistling and Amy's comment about Stacie left forgotten.

The kiss startled Beca but the shock only lasted an instant before Beca brought her hands up to tangle in Chloe's hair as she deepened the kiss, smiling into it. Her eyes were closed and her mind was muddled. The feeling of kissing Chloe as an official couple, in front of the other Bella’s with 100% support was freedom, she hadn't felt freedom like it in years.

After the second onslaught of cheering, and the promise of a celebration later that night, the girls eventually dispersed; Jessica and Ashley disappeared upstairs to work on a project for their art class, Cynthia Rose went to Skype her girlfriend in Maine, Amy and Beca entered into a heated discussion over the obviousness of Chloe's sexuality and Chloe found herself sat across from a troubled looking Stacie. Since Aubrey had left, Chloe and Stacie had grown close, especially after Stacie dropped the 'dumb bitch' act of Freshman year and Chloe discovered that her actual personality was something she easily clicked with. A frown formed on the redhead's face as she regarded the girl opposite her; the usually confident, outlandish Stacie looked so small (which was saying something, because Chloe swore that girl was like 6 foot) and that worried Chloe. "C’mon, tell Aunty Chlo what's wrong." she joked softly, smiling to herself at the way Stacie's lips lifted at the corner into a small smile.

Stacie smiled at her friend, but shook her head. "Don't worry about it" she replied after a few seconds. She felt her hands clam up and her throat go dry. She and Chloe had gotten very close since Aubrey left and she valued their friendship. Stacie had been constantly worrying about how she felt ever since Aubrey left and she desperately wanted to tell Chloe but she would hate it if her feelings affected their friendship, even though she knew, in her head and in her heart that Chloe would be nothing short of supportive. She cleared her throat before trying to change the subject, "I'm so pleased for you and Beca...honestly" Stacie said, sincerely as the look of worry and deep thought returned to the taller girl's face. Although she meant the statement, she couldn't help but feel a pang of sadness mixed with jealousy that it wasn't her and Aubrey announcing their new found love to the group. ‘Why did Amy have to say that…?!’ She thought to herself as she felt tears well behind her eyes. ‘Don't do this now..!’ Stacie had lowered her head trying to act casual...and failing...trying to avoid the redhead's gaze.

"Thank you Stace," Chloe said genuinely. It was clear that the taller girl was upset, but Chloe knew Stacie and a Stacie who had been pushed to talk about something she wasn't ready to was a force to be reckoned with. No, Chloe knew that if she waited, Stacie would come to her.

Stacie willed the tears not to overflow and pretended to be distracted by something behind her so she could dry her eyes as best she could, when she turned back to face Chloe, she plastered on a wide smile which did nothing to cover the sadness she felt and asked, “you want a drink?” The taller girl stood with the question.

If there was one thing Chloe had mastered over the years, it was the art of patience. Her natural instinct was to vault over the table and tackle her friend in a hug but inside, Chloe knew that that was not the answer. The redhead had a near perfect knowledge of how to comfort her various friends and Stacie 101 was 'Don't push it". So Chloe fought her instinct and instead smiled back, "Sure. Whatever you're having"

"Sure thing, I was just gonna grab a water" Stacie replied as she made her way over to the kitchen. As she entered the empty room she crossed to the fridge and took out two bottles and placed them on the counter. She sighed a shaky breath and so she moved to close the door connected to the living room. As soon as the door clicked shut, tears broke through the mental barrier and rolled down her face. She didn't make a sound, she just felt overwhelmed and angry that Amy had said anything at all. Stacie moved to sit at the counter and took some deep breaths, laughing bitterly to herself when she thought about how stupid she must look. After a few seconds she forcefully wiped the tears away, making sure not to miss any, causing her cheeks to go red with the pressure she had applied to them.

When Stacie returned, the redness in her eyes and cheeks was the last straw for Chloe. "Oh Stace..." She said softly. "You know you can talk to me right? I won't ask, because that isn't fair, but I know how much it sucks when you feel like you're alone." She placed a supportive hand on Stacie's thigh, wishing she could make her friend feel better.

Stacie was grateful, thankful and appreciative of Chloe's kindness. With trembling hands Stacie offered one of the waters to Chloe, still refusing to meet her gaze. She knew if she did that, she would cry again and she didn't want to do that in front of the rest of the Bella’s. Stacie's instinct when something troubled her was always to bottle it up, suffer in silence and hope it goes away. Most things she could deal with on her own, but this...was becoming unbearable. In a moment of clarity, the taller girl realised that there was no way Chloe would judge her or be anything other than the kind friend she knew her to be. She leaned closer to Chloe and whispered, “can you meet me in my room in ten minutes?” She asked in a small voice.


	15. Get Your Game Face On

Chloe nodded subtly, just enough for the taller girl to notice. Stacie stood quickly, grabbing her bottle of water,e and dashed upstairs to compose herself, Chloe presumed. The redhead anxiously waited, her left knee bouncing with anticipation and worry as she watched the clock on the wall tick by. Chloe was usually a very calm, confident person; she radiated confidence throughout her body, from her bright red hair to her, sometimes bold, clothing choices but when it came to her friend's wellbeing, Chloe was a mess. Her mom (and Aubrey as she got to know her) always said she cared too much, that she loved too easily and Chloe often wondered to herself whether that were true. All she knew was when it came to her friends, nothing else mattered and she was willing to do anything to protect them. As soon as the minute hand moved past ten minutes, the redhead all but sprinted up the stairs, coming to a halt outside Stacie's door, knocking politely.

At the sound of the knock, Stacie jumped, gasping slightly. She smiled slightly as she realised it must be Chloe. A feeling of anxiety filled her stomach as she crossed to open the door. She pulled it open and stepped aside smiling to let Chloe know that she could come in.

Returning Stacie's smile, Chloe waltzed past her and sat herself on the bed as Stacie shut the door, and then turned to face the redhead. "What's wrong Stace?" Chloe said, her voice full of concern. She patted the bed, indicating that Stacie should sit beside her, ‘cause Chloe wanted nothing more than the wrap her friend up in a hug and squeeze all her problems away.

As Stacie sat beside Chloe she felt the redhead place an arm around her back. “Erm…” her voice quivered with a sudden wave of emotion. “I'm...I...need to tell you something” she sniffed as she felt the tears build.

"Okay" Chloe said slowly, the concern in her voice leaning into full blown panic. If Chloe thought she was confident, she had nothing on Stacie and the redhead hadn't ever, not in their two years of friendship, seen her like this. "I'm listening." she continued in a soft voice, rubbing small circles on Stacie's shoulder.

Stacie took a couple of deep breaths before continuing, her hands clasped together nervously in her lap. “Well...I erm...I really don't know how to put it so I guess the best way would be to just...say it…” Stacie was aware of how obvious her stalling was but she couldn't help it. “I...think...I'm...I mean, I know but I…err…” after a few seconds of silence, the tears built in her eyes more and she whispered, “I'm sorry…” for her ridiculous behaviour.

Chloe knew how Stacie worked, and where constant reassurance worked for Beca, telling Stacie that she didn't need to apologise wouldn't do anything for her. Instead, she nudged her shoulder playfully and said, with a lighthearted tone. "You're being ridiculous Conrad, this is me you're talking to." Stacie laughed, nodding to herself, knowing the redhead was right.

After a few seconds of laughter, Stacie felt a lot more relaxed and so she shook her head slightly as if to clear it and turned to face Chloe. “Okay…” she started as the anxiety crept back into her chest. Her breathing increased and her hands started to clam up so she closed her eyes and blurted out, “I think I'm in love with Aubrey!” There was a moment of silence. Stacie opened one eye to find her friend looking back at her with an expression she couldn't read. The grin had disappeared from the redhead's face but it hadn't been replaced with a look of horror or confusion. Stacie waited for Chloe's response to become apparent.

At Stacie's admission, Chloe's initial reaction had been surprise, but the more she thought about it, the more it made everything make sense; the way they grew so much closer as friends after Aubrey graduated, the way Stacie had so many people to stay over after said graduation, that the girls joked she needed a revolving door, the way Stacie had almost completely ignored the blonde the week after the ICCA finals, the week leading up to Aubrey's graduation. "Oh thank god I thought you were gonna tell me you were dying or something!" Chloe blurted out. Stacie's eyes widened for a moment before she burst out laughing, the redhead joining in soon after. Taking a deep breath to control her giggles, Chloe said, "Okay, so you love Aubrey, what's the problem?"

Stacie felt instant relief and felt her entire body relax at how chilled Chloe was about all this. "Thank God..." She said mostly to herself, "I thought you might..." Stacie realised that finishing that sentence was pointless and so she shook her head and turned her attention to answering the redhead's question. "Well, look around, you don't see Aubrey here do you? I miss her but the worst thing is...I'm fairly certain that she doesn't like me like that." Stacie admitted as she let her posture drop slightly.

"I know how you feel," Chloe replied, her voice low, before she heard how her words sounded out loud. "About missing her, I mean!" Chloe laughed to herself, and noticed the corners of Stacie's lips twitching in what could almost be called a smile. "Have you asked her? I know that sounds stupid, but you really don't know until you do." Chloe offered as she continued to rub Stacie's shoulder comfortingly.

Stacie laughed at Chloe's word choice before answering. "God no! I mean we were really close. I didn't want to freak her out...freaked out Aubrey is not a fun time!" Stacie said with the hint of a smile. "I have no idea what she's even doing...don't hate me but after she left..." Stacie averted her gaze back towards her own fingers. "For the first couple of weeks Aubrey was Skyping me pretty regularly but I never answered..." The taller girl held her head in her hands with the feeling of shame that overcame her. "Every time I saw her profile pop up on my laptop it gave me butterflies but I knew that if I answered the call, I'd make a fool of myself...she probably hates me" Stacie finished quietly with a slight break to her voice that was an indication to Chloe that the tears had started. 

"Hey..." Chloe soothed softly, pulling Stacie closer, " Now I know that's not true, Aubrey could never hate you. She misses you. And you know I couldn't hate you either, right? Not in a million years Stace" She said comfortingly. "You should talk to her." Chloe tried to think quickly for a way to cheer Stacie up when an idea hit for a way to make all of the Bella's happy, "But first, I'm calling the Trebles, we're gonna have an, off the books, afternoon riff off. So get your game face on Conrad.”

Stacie thought about calling Aubrey but the idea filled her with dread at the thought of her saying something stupid. She made a mental note to ask Chloe to help her later. It had been a while since the Bella’s had gotten together for a good old-fashioned riff off with the Trebles. “Okay, great!” Stacie said, grinning properly for the first time in a good while.


	16. The Riff Off

Chloe rounded up the Bella's, directing Emily to call Benji and organise with The Trebles. The younger girl squealed, nearly throwing her phone across the room in excitement at her 'first proper riff off! Oh-M-Aca-G!'. Chloe chuckled at her enthusiasm and left her to talk to Benji. She wandered over to Beca who was stood smirking in the corner of the room. "Hey you" she said softly, wrapping an arm around the smaller girl.

Beca, as silly as it sounded, had missed Chloe's touch for the past 40 minutes since they told the girls and wrapped her own arms around Chloe's back and squeezed gently. "Hey, baby..." She whispered before kissing Chloe on the cheek. "Where did you disappear off to?" The brunette asked with a slight frown.

Chloe returned Beca's kiss, leaning into their embrace. "Stacie needed something, it should all be okay though." She sensed Beca's grip on her tightened slightly. "I'm all yours now babe" she teased. "You ready for this riff off? Gonna kick some Treble butt"

“Perfect” Beca said smiling up at Chloe. “And, yes! We need a good riff off, great idea, babe” the smaller girl grinned and threw a wink to Chloe. She intertwined their fingers together instinctively as she looked back to the room watching as everyone started planning possible songs for the riff off.

"If Black Michael Jackson comes up we're sorted" Cynthia Rose whooped, causing Chloe to splutter out a loud laugh. "Alright, alright guys!" She called over the noise, catching all but Fat Amy's attention. "Amy, stop trying to get a good picture of 'the girls' to send to Bumper, this is serious business." The blonde reluctantly pulled her top up and put her phone away. "Okay ladies, let's go kill it!" Chloe called and was met with a loud cheer in response, as her and the Bellas filtered out of the house and started heading towards the pool.

When the girls arrived at the pool, the Trebles were already there, cheering and whooping. Jesse was there hanging back slightly from the group, looking rather awkward, he caught Beca's eye and waved slightly with a tight smile. Beca returned the wave before turning around to walk into the room backwards while shouting to her team. "You ready Bella's?!" An uproar of whistles and cheers came from the rest of girls in response.

Somebody, one of the Trebles Chloe supposed, had made a makeshift spinner for the categories and had stuck it to the wall of the pool. Jesse spun the wheel and Chloe and the Bellas watched. It land on. 'Songs ruined by Glee'. Chloe was about the jump in but Jesse got there first. "When you see my face hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell. When you walk my way hope it gives you hell hope it gives you hell. Now where's your picket fence love-"   
  
Chloe couldn't take anymore and stepped right in front of Jesse. "Love tonight. I kissed a girl and I liked it. No I don't even know your name, it doesn't matter" The Bellas instantly backed her up and she could hear Beca's voice harmonising with her. "You're my experimental game, just human nature." Turning to Beca, she ran a finger over her lips and trailed it down her body as she sang. "It's not what good girls do, not how they should behave. My head gets so confused, hard to obey."

Chloe turned to face the trebles as she continued the lyrics, “I kissed a girl-”

Benji moved forward, his eyes locked on Emily interrupting the lyrics with a high pitch voice. “Girl wants, what a girl needs, what a girl wants, what a girl needs, yeah c’mon…” the rest of Trebles looked at each other, baffled for a few seconds before they started to give Benji a backing track as Benji continued. “I wanna thank you for giving me-”

Beca strode up to Benji, smirking as she interrupted. "me, feel like I'm living a teenage dream, the way you turn me on. I can't sleep, let's run away and don't ever look back, don't ever look back" Chloe blushed at Beca's choice of song, the flush of her cheeks only deepening as she continued. "My heart stops, when you look at me" Chloe confidently walked up behind Beca, licking her finger and tapping Beca's shoulder, making a "Tsss" noise as Beca sang "Just one touch, now baby-”

Jesse jumped back in front of Beca and belted out the lyrics with extra volume. “Baby, baby, baby, why d'you wanna wanna hurt me so bad?” The rest of the Trebles backed him up instantly with a backing chorus of “So bad, so bad, so bad”. Jesse continued as he got closer and closer to Beca, acting out the lyrics like a douche. “I tried to tell my mamma but she told me ‘this is one for your dad.’” The Trebles sang in the background as Beca stepped back from Jesse, personally hurt at the choice of song. “Your dad, your dad, your dad.”

Chloe almost growled at Jesse, her hands beginning to shake with anger. As the trebles continued, she planned when she was gonna jump in, catching eyes with Stacie and mouthing her song choice to the taller girl, who nodded. "Why lady? Oh, I l-" Jesse sang, as Chloe strode towards him. "love I loved the most. I learned to live half alive and now you want me one more time" Chloe acted on impulse as Stacie harmonised the melody with her and shoved Jesse backwards with one hand accusingly. "And who do you think you are? Runnin' 'round leaving scars, collecting your jar of hearts and tearing love apart. You're gonna catch a cold from the ice inside your soul. So don't come back for me. Who do you think you are?" Chloe finished, looking strikingly at Jesse, who looked stunned. There was a long silence as Chloe stared him down, until Cynthia rose cheered that they had won the round and Stacie pulled her away by the shoulder.

Another member of the Trembles spun the makeshift category spinner and it landed on 'Black Michael Jackson songs' Cynthia Rose cheered loudly before skidding to the middle of the pool singing before Bumper could start "She was more like a beauty queen from a movie scene. I said don't mind, but what do you mean I am the one" the Bella's backed her immediately.

However, Jesse cut in almost immediately. "The things I feel for you but girl, you know it's true. Stay with me, fulfill my dreams and I'll be all you'll need-" until Cynthia Rose stepped up. "Oh no no no, what is this white shit? The category is _black_ Michael Jackson, Swanson" Stacie, who had hurriedly been tapping away at her phone, held it up to the Trebles, proving in fact that Michael Jackson had in fact been white when the song was released. Chloe couldn't help but feel incredibly smug at Jesse's fuck up, grinning with glee as she realised it meant that they had won.

The rest of the Bella's all jumped up hugging each other and cheering. Beca jumped forward and fist pumped the air, cheering. She still felt personally offended at Jesse's earlier song choice and so grabbed the whooping redhead suddenly and, directly in front of Jesse, pulled her in for a passionate, deep kiss while holding up a middle finger at the boy. She felt as she was doing this that she was being a little harsh but 'that song was fucking rude' she told herself. The rest of the Trebles all voiced their annoyance at Jesse simultaneously.

"Fuck you too Becs" Jesse called as Benji tried, and failed to pull him away. That was the last straw for Chloe. Pulling away from Beca sharply, the redhead strode towards Jesse, grabbing him by his collar suddenly. "Just because I nearly broke my hand, doesn't mean I won't break your nose Swanson" She spat, her eyes never leaving his. She pulled him to the side of the pool, away from the rest of the acapella crowd and let go of his shirt, which he straightened. "Look Jesse, for what it's worth I'm sorry, but sometimes people fall for each other and nothing can stop it. It's not Beca's fault, and I think you know that. Give her some time, but I suggest if you ever want to speak to her again, you better apologise." Chloe said in a low voice before turning on her heel and walking back to the Bella's who welcomed her with open arms and cheers of a party later.

Chloe's warning played over and over in Jesse's mind, he looked over at Beca and waited until she looked in his direction after about a minute and a hug for Chloe she did so. He lifted his hand slightly and mouthed the words ‘I'm sorry’. Beca held his gaze with a scowl on her face and a shake of her head. Beca was angry, he said he'd be there for her and be supportive and then, in front of everyone, he pulled this shit. She wasn't having any of it. She turned around to rejoin her fellow Bellas as they started towards the exit of the pool.  

Wrapping her arm around the smaller girl's waist, Chloe followed the rest of the Bella's back towards the house. only vaguely listening as Fat Amy starting yelling brashly about how they should order pizza. "You okay?" she murmured, slowing her pace slightly so the two of them broke away from the group, just enough to keep their conversation private.

The lyrics Jesse had sung right in her face with a spiteful edge danced around in her mind. ‘why d'you wanna wanna hurt me so bad?’ ‘I tried to tell my mamma’ ‘your dad, your dad…’ The brunette blinked out of her trance and looked up at Chloe next to her. She realised she'd been frowning and so relaxed her face. “I dunno” Beca responded with a shrug. “Not really?” She said questioningly as she moved her arm back to hold Chloe's hand on her own waist as they walked.

Chloe squeezed Beca's hand comfortingly. "I know Jesse was a dick, he's hurting but he shouldn't have taken that out on you, I'm sure he'll come around." Chloe offered, leaning into Beca slightly as they walked. "Is there something else bothering you though?" The redhead asked, turning her head slightly to look at Beca, her hand never leaving her waist.

Beca had leaned her head onto Chloe's chest as the redhead had moved closer but she whipped it back at the question. Beca looked around and noticed a couple of the girls looking back to them, probably just to check that the pair were okay. She couldn't admit to something being wrong while they could all hear her, they'd all want to know so she lied, telling herself to tell Chloe once they had some privacy. "Erm...n- it's fine, I'll be fine" she said with a tired smile as she leaned closer to Chloe again.

'Bullshit' was the first word that popped into Chloe's head at Beca's admission; Chloe knew her better than that. But, she also knew not to push Beca for information, she was an extremely private person and Chloe didn't want to say or do anything that might break Beca's trust in her, so rather than opting to pull Beca to a stop and call out her bullshit, she nodded. "Okay, well I'm here if you need anything." They rounded the corner leading to the Bella house and Chloe's mind wandered as to what Beca was thinking, and a small pit of worry settled in her stomach but she pushed it aside, 'If Beca said she was fine, you have to believe her' Chloe thought to herself. Cynthia Rose unlocked the door and the girls all flopped down on the couches and armchairs in the living room, whilst Amy rooted around the kitchen for a pizza delivery menu.

Beca and Chloe flopped down next to each other - of course - and Beca squeezed her arm behind Chloe's back and wrapped her other arm over the redhead's waist. She rested her head on Chloe's chest and smiled. They left a space next to the pair for Amy when she’d found the menu and Stacie sat down on the other couch, looking in deep thought, again. Cynthia Rose sat down next to Stacie, a little closer than was strictly necessary and Emily perched herself next to Cynthia Rose. The rest of the girls all found places either on the floor or the arms of the sofas. 

Chloe leaned into Beca's embrace, feeling almost completely content, but with that tiny little nagging worry still running through her mind. She forced it aside again once Amy, having found the pizza, sat down beside her. Due to her less than normal childhood, Chloe had never eaten pizza until she came to college, she swore herself off it when some boy in middle school said it made you fat, but since Chloe stopped (well, almost) worrying about her figure, it had become her favourite food and she bounced excitedly in her seat, nearly ripping the menu from Amy's hands after the blonde had jotted down her order on a spare piece of paper. Taking the paper in a much calmer manner, Chloe neatly wrote. "Medium Pepperoni and Pineapple" underneath Amy's scrawl, before passing the menu and order sheet to Beca, who looked at it, and then back to Chloe like she was insane.

Beca moved forward and reluctantly removed her arm out from underneath the redhead and quickly wrote her order down before returning to her previous position. ‘Large Pepperoni’ she handed the paper over to Stacie before nuzzling her head into Chloe's shoulder.

The rest of the girls all placed their orders, Chloe's eyes widening in horror as Lilly scribbled down "Medium with anchovies x4" and Amy took it upon herself to call the restaurant. When she returned, stating that it would be around an hour, the group settled into easy conversation. Beca leaned around Chloe to smirk at Amy. "So how's Bumper?" She asked, one eyebrow raised as the blonde's cheeks flushed.

  
"How should I know?" She replied, a little too fast. Chloe jumped in, chuckling "Amy you know that instagram account 'hotbabes101' that Bumper follows?" the redhead dramatically pointed over to Stacie, who was shaking with laughter. "We've all seen those pictures." Laughter erupted from the rest of the Bellas at the mortification on Amy's face and the joking and teasing continued for the next hour when there was a loud, urgent knock on the door. "That'll be the pizza!" Chloe sprung from her seat excitedly. "I'll get it!" She skipped towards the door, opening it with a smile "Hi- What the fuck?" because instead of a pizza delivery boy, stood a very stressed, very anxious looking Aubrey Posen.


	17. Suffering In Silence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the long delay in updates... You know the drill, exams and the like. Thanks for all the positive comments and support!

Beca looked up at the surprise in Chloe's voice. She stood as the redhead jumped onto Aubrey excitedly, almost knocking her over. “Heeyyyyyyyy OhMyGoshICan’tBelieveYou’reHere!!” Chloe squealed. Beca walked up behind Chloe and once she'd let Aubrey go Beca gave her friend a tight hug, grinning. “Why didn't you tell us you were coming?” Beca asked, knowing the answer and simultaneously praying that Aubrey would have enough sense not to mention their earlier conversations in front of the other Bella’s.

As soon as Chloe had started squealing, Stacie looked up and the sight of Aubrey was enough for her to feel her face go red. She stood instinctively, suddenly feeling very self-conscious she moved away from the sofa. Aubrey was looking around the room being greeted by the other Bella's with hugs, kisses and high fives. The blonde's eyes met Stacie's for a brief moment. Stacie could've sworn that the eye contact was held for a beat longer than usual when she was talking to the rest of group but she pushed that thought out of her mind with a curse to herself for thinking so wishfully. Stacie had held back from Aubrey and she realised that she was the only one not to greet Aubrey when she came in. She moved slightly to do so but stopped herself. ‘You’ll just fuck up’ she told herself.  

As Stacie turned her back and walked away towards the kitchen, Aubrey's stomach dropped. She hasn't seen her in nearly a year and seeing her just now, made her miss her all the more, which was stupid, Aubrey thought, as they were literally in the same house. Despite her sadness over Stacie's dismissal, she came for a reason and that reason was to talk to Chloe so, after greeting all the Bellas with promises to catch up soon, she caught eyes with redhead, who nodded and led Aubrey upstairs. Once safely inside the confines of her room, Chloe sat down with a small smile. "I missed you Bree."

Aubrey sat beside her friend with a smile, she moved an arm around Chloe's shoulders and squeezed ever so gently. "I missed you too Chlo. Now..." The blonde had no idea how to handle this conversation and so took a breath before continuing. "What's going on, Chlo?" She asked.

"I was so stupid Bree, so naïve. I should've told you what was going on, but I was so scared." Chloe said softly. For once, she didn't cry, she simply watched Aubrey's face, the fact she was here in front of her and not hundreds of miles away talking to Chloe through a screen was a huge comfort.

The sight of Chloe so quiet and not bounding around excitedly, saddened the blonde. Aubrey didn't ask about what had happened, she knew enough from Beca earlier and she didn't want to bring up those memories for Chloe. Instead she moved closed to Chloe and pulled the redhead's head closer gently and landed a soft kiss on Chloe's forehead before resting her head on Chloe's. "You can tell me anything, Chloe" she said reassuringly. "Please, if ever you're going through anything...tell me...or Beca. Tell someone eh?" She rubbed Chloe's arm up and down in a friendly manner.

Chloe smiled warmly at Aubrey, genuinely touched at her sentiment. "Thanks Bree, I will, I promise. I'm so tired of hiding things you know?" Aubrey nodded sympathetically and Chloe suddenly remembered her conversation with Stacie earlier. Deciding to approach the subject carefully, she tentatively asked. "So what's up with you and Stacie?"

Aubrey's arm left Chloe's side slowly. She sighed. Aubrey had always had the instinct to hide her emotions so even though all she wanted to do was cry she just looked down at her hands before looking back up at Chloe sporting a fake smile. Chloe saw through it instantly. “What do you mean?” Aubrey asked, feigning confusion. But she _was_ confused, not about the question but her feelings, she hadn't stopped thinking about Stacie the whole time she was away and every time Stacie hadn't answered her calls she'd had a moment of weakness and let the tears fall. She didn't know what she'd done to upset Stacie so and she'd never been given an opportunity to ask her. All she knew is she missed her friend.

"You know what I mean" Chloe replied softly, "You were so close, and just now you didn't even speak to each other" Chloe could understand why Stacie had acted awkward, but she honestly couldn't decipher the blonde's thought process. "What's going on in that head of yours huh?" she asked, tapping Aubrey on the head lightly.

"No, I erm..." Aubrey started as she felt herself tense up. She leant forward with a sigh and held her head in her hands. "I don't know...Chlo. My head's all over the place and as for Stacie" her stomach did a somersault at the sound of her name, especially her name on her lips. "...I think she's mad at me and I have no idea what I've done wrong..." There was a nagging feeling in the back of the blonde's mind urging her to tell Chloe that she couldn't stop thinking about Stacie and that she'd missed her so much and that she had no idea what any of it means but she held it all in, hypocritically doing just what she'd told Chloe not to do; suffer in silence.

Chloe waited for Aubrey to continue, knowing there was more than what the blonde had said, but she was met with silence. Chloe placed her hand on Aubrey's knee, rubbing her thumb back and forth comfortingly. "What are you not telling me Bree?"

'Oh crap!' Aubrey thought. The tears were beginning to well behind her eyes. "I...nothi- I..." The blonde caught Chloe's eyes and Chloe's arched eyebrow showed that her lying was unconvincing and she couldn't bare to lie to her friend anymore. She felt as if she was going to explode if she didn't say anything and so she was surprised to hear her voice as such a quiet whisper. "I can't stop thinking about her, Chlo."

Chloe tried to hold back her grin. If Aubrey was saying what she thought she was saying, then Aubrey and Stacie were just as bad as her and Beca when it came to miscommunication. Chloe continued to rub Aubrey's knee and said "Right...And why are you crying about it?"

Aubrey reacted to that question by feeling her cheeks and yes, the redhead was right, the tears had started to fall. "Shit..." The blonde said under her breath. The realisation that she was crying only increased the tears. "Because...she hates me..." Aubrey said with a sob at the end. There was no other explanation for Stacie's behaviour other than that, in Aubrey's mind. At the slight sound of laughter coming from beside her, the blonde stood. "What the fuck, Chlo?" The blonde said angrily, as she stepped back into the middle of the room, away from Chloe. She'd trusted her best friend with something that's been causing her worry for months and here she was laughing at her.

Chloe realised her laughter had been misinterpreted by Aubrey and quickly shut up, moving towards her friend. "Christ, no Aubrey, wait-" She took the blonde's arm, and said softly. "I wasn't laughing at you. It's just-" She paused, it really wasn't her place to tell Stacie's secret, even to Aubrey. "I think you and Stace really have got your wires crossed. Talk to her, trust me." 

Chloe's varying reactions were confusing the hell out of Aubrey and she frowned. "What? No, I...don't think that's-" Chloe cut Aubrey off, "Trust me..." The redhead had emphasised the words and grinned at Aubrey. Chloe opened the door for them to go downstairs and gestured for Aubrey to lead the way. Aubrey walked out of the room still thoroughly confused. Chloe followed behind her.


	18. Finally on the Same Page

Stacie sat downstairs, bouncing her knee nervously. Aubrey's unexpected presence set her on edge because she knew she had upset the blonde but also didn't know how long her self control could last before she blurted out her feelings and ruined everything. When Aubrey walked in the room, Stacie froze. It sounded cliché, but after ignoring the blonde's calls for so long, she'd forgotten just how beautiful Aubrey actually was, and her heart jumped in her chest. She caught Chloe's eye as she came up behind Aubrey, and the redhead winked. 'What the-?' Stacie thought to herself, just as Aubrey called out to her. "Stacie, can I talk to you?" the blonde coughed awkwardly and Stacie couldn't help but find it adorable. "Please?" Stacie shrugged and followed the blonde into the kitchen, shutting the door behind her.

Stacie tried to compose herself as she clicked the door closed. “What's wrong? I-I mean, what's up?” She felt her face heat up at her inability to speak properly, she avoided the blonde's gaze and crossed to the fridge. She pulled out a water and handed it to Aubrey. Their fingers touched as Aubrey took the bottle and Stacie whipped her hand back a little too suddenly before cursing herself as she saw the look of hurt on Aubrey's face. Stacie stood at the counter awkwardly. She wanted nothing more than to grab Aubrey and kiss her right there and then, to feel her, touch her, love her… The blonde looked so beautiful in this light and Stacie wanted to tell her but she kept quiet, waiting for Aubrey to speak.

"I miss you" The words slipped from Aubrey's mouth before she could stop them and her face flushed with embarrassment. "I miss you too Bree" Stacie replied, her voice soft and low. Suddenly, Aubrey felt a rush of anger; how dare Stacie say that? Aubrey had tried so hard to stay in contact and Stacie had ignored her for months. Unable to control her voice, Aubrey started to speak, shaking with anger. "You miss me? You fucking miss me? Where the fuck were you then?" She moved towards the taller girl, unsure of what she was going to do when she reached her. "I called you every damn day for fucking months and you never answered. I needed you Stace, where the fuck were you?" Aubrey was directly in front of Stacie now, her hands shaking at her sides. She took a quick breath and when she spoke again, her voice was low and calm, but Stacie could tell the blonde was still livid. "Don't you dare say you missed me"

Stacie felt sick. She regretted every missed call, every excuse, everything. She wanted to cry and scream and shout. She stepped back as Aubrey got closer. Her anger was catching and the brunette felt a rush of anger fill her. “You think I don't hate myself for it?! God, Bree! I don't need this shit from you! You just turn up out of nowhere and have a fucking go at me” she hands were gesturing wildly in the air. She moved around the counter to distance herself from the blonde and continued. “I really don't need this right now…” Stacie turned around to try to prevent the tears that were already forming in her eyes.

Aubrey followed her round the counter and grabbed Stacie by the shoulder, turning her round to face her again. "Don't fucking turn away from me Stacie, not again. You think I needed it? You think I needed you not picking up the phone when my dad was in the hospital and the only person I wanted to talk to was you? If you hate yourself so much then why did you do it?" The blonde's voice broke on her last question and she choked back a sob. "What did I do to deserve that Stace?" She asked, her voice quiet as her own tears formed.

Stacie stared at Aubrey for a second before answering in a quiet voice. “You left me.” She felt absolutely horrific that Aubrey had gone through all of that and she had just ignored her but her anger seeped through still. “You fucking left me for your fucking retreat” Stacie’s voice came out harsh and bitter punctuating every words as her hand gestured in the air. “Don't you dare put all that on me!” Stacie wanted to pull Aubrey into a hug and tell her how sorry she was but her pride was stubbornly rock solid. She moved away  _ again _ and started towards the door. ‘No, fuck that’ she thought to herself as she spun around to face Aubrey. “Don't okay? Just fucking don't.” Her voice was still harsh and her eyes were wide with anger. Stacie hated the way Aubrey made her feel, the way her heart raced when she entered a room and the way her ability to speak just ceased to exist. The amount of control the blonde had over her was terrifying.

Aubrey's jaw dropped open. "Left you? Left you? You were never mine to leave Stacie." Aubrey spat, she couldn't understand why she was still yelling, all she wanted to do was grab Stacie by the hair and kiss her but her mouth had other ideas. "You were the one with a different girl in and out of your room every fucking night. I was never yours to lose. I had no fucking reason to stay here."

Stacie’s anger wavered as the blonde’s words repeated in her mind. ‘I was never yours’ ‘no fucking reason to stay’ she felt upset and hurt but Aubrey was right. Aubrey wasn't hers and Stacie hadn't given her any indication that she wanted her to be. She'd been a complete asshole and she felt awful. She wasn't angry anymore but her voice still decided to shout her thoughts. “The only reason I fucked so many people was to forget about you!” Stacie felt her face go red and her hands clam up at her admission. She just watched as the blonde stepped away, a look of shock and confusion adorning her face. There was an uncomfortable silence between them. She felt it coming, the word-vomit, “None of those girls meant a damn thing to me, Bree! I wanted you! And I'm sorry about your Dad, really I am, I just, I couldn't…” as the blonde moved further and further away, Stacie moved closer and closer trying desperately to close the gap between the pair. The brunette had forgotten to breath and continued as her face got redder and redder. “I'm sorry, I'm so sorry….I couldn't see you, I knew I'd make a mess of things an-” 

Aubrey crashed her lips into Stacie's, hard, forcing the taller girl to back into the counter, her hands gripping either side of Stacie's face, her fingers tangling in her hair. Stacie opened her mouth in surprise and Aubrey took advantage, biting down on the taller girl's bottom lip, causing her to gasp. Pulling away breathlessly, Aubrey stared into Stacie's eyes. "I'm still really mad."

Her eyes were wide and she felt herself start to sweat at what had just happened. She didn't respond verbally, just physically. She tried to step back but felt that her knees were going to give way underneath her so she felt around behind her desperately until she felt a stool and she pulled herself onto it. "Wha..." She started as her breathing hitched in her throat. She swallowed hard as her eyes never left Aubrey's. She had no idea what to do. 'What the fuck just happened?' She asked herself before standing again and moving closer to Aubrey.

"If you don't want this then tell me to back off." Aubrey said, still breathless, her heart racing. "Because otherwise I'm gonna do that again" She watched the other girl intently, desperately trying to gage her reaction, not wanting to scare her but not wanting to make her intentions unclear.

A sweet, genuine smile spread across Stacie's lips. She had wanted this for so long and convinced herself that it would never happen that once it had, she'd gone into shock. The complete lack of ambiguity in Aubrey's words was enough to give her the confidence to step closer still and pull the blondes hips into hers. "Not if I get there first" she teased as she pressed her lips against Aubrey's softly at first but getting more passionate and deep as the pair continued. Stacie's hands found their way down Aubrey's body to rest perfectly on the blonde's hips.

Aubrey couldn't pull Stacie close enough to her. Her hands gripped her taller girls waist, bunching into fists in the fabric of her shirt. Stacie turned suddenly, and it was Aubrey's turn to be shoved against the counter. There was a sharp pain as her back connected with the granite but all she could focus on was Stacie; Stacie's hands running up and down her body, Stacie's lips on hers, Stacie, Stacie, St- She felt the taller girl draw back and Aubrey realised she'd been holding her breath for a long time. Taking a shuddering breath, Aubrey let out a shaky laugh. "Wow"

Stacie grinned at the sentiment and picked Aubrey up high enough to perch her onto the counter. Usually Stacie was quite a rough lover and the whole ‘sex against the counter’ stuff was pretty normal for her but she knew that it wasn’t Aubrey's style and she also wanted to treat the blonde with more respect than her casual partners. She massaged Aubrey's lower back where she'd been pushed into the counter a few seconds earlier and kissed her. This time it was slow, careful and full of love rather than lust.

Aubrey hummed into the kiss, tangling her hands in Stacie's hair to hold her close. She knew she needed to apologise for getting angry earlier and so she broke the kiss, her lips dropping to the taller girl's neck. "For what it's worth" She said softly, her lips running over Stacie's neck. "I'm sorry for getting angry at you." She planted another kiss against her pulse point. "I'm sorry for leaving."

Stacie felt herself fill with emotion, she'd selfishly wished for those words for months and to hear them said so sincerely almost made her cry. She smiled at the feeling of Aubrey's lips on her neck. “No...don't apologise, Bree. I'm sorry...for everything.” Her smile faltered at the feeling of shame that overwhelmed her. She reluctantly stepped out of Aubrey's touch, still resting her hands on the blonde's knees. “I'm so sorry…” she said softly, “I promise not to ignore you ever again...if you need me for anything, call me, day or night, I promise okay?” She stepped back into the warmth of Aubrey's body and hugged her tightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the slow updates! We really appreciate your support, thanks!


	19. Secrets

Aubrey returned Stacie's embrace, her fingers gripping the back of the girl's shirt. A light knock on the door interrupted and the two jumped about, only to breathe a sigh of relief when it was Chloe that came in. "Sorry to bother you guys, but the actual pizza guy just showed up. Everything okay?" The redhead raised an eyebrow, having heard the pair's argument in its entirety. Stacie nodded hastily and the two followed Chloe back into the living room where the Bella's were regrouping after being ushered upstairs by Chloe pretty much as soon as Aubrey and Stacie had entered the kitchen. Chloe sat down on the couch, gesturing to Beca, who had just sauntered downstairs, to join her as she reached over to the coffee table to grab her's and the brunette's pizzas.

Stacie sat down on the other sofa and breathed the biggest sigh of contentment she'd sighed in months. Aubrey walked into the room and stood, looking between the empty seat next to Chloe and the empty seat next to Stacie. Stacie opened her eyes to see the blonde looking torn and so she patted the sofa next to her and smiled. With that Aubrey smiled and made her way over to Stacie. She snuggled into Stacie as the taller girl lifted her arm over Aubrey's shoulders and kissed her on the forehead, to which Beca cheered loudly. 

Aubrey blushed a bright red and Chloe elbowed Beca in the ribs gently. The rest of the Bellas filtered in and Amy wandered into the room, holding a slice of pizza that she'd managed to grab before being kicked out by Chloe. She looked between Beca and Chloe, Stacie and Aubrey, Cynthia Rose who was obviously texting her girlfriend due to the wide smile on her face, Jessica and Ashley who were cuddled on a loveseat in the corner and said "There must be something in the water, oh my god" causing Chloe to giggle, leaning further into Beca as she chewed her food.

Beca lifted her arm up and pulled Chloe closer, mirroring Stacie's behaviour towards Aubrey. “There must be” she said with a giggle. Aubrey leaned forward to grab a slice of pizza before returning to Stacie's embrace. “How you feeling?” Beca asked Chloe quietly.

"I'm glad everything seems sorted out. Those two certainly look better" Chloe chuckled, nodding her head towards Stacie and Aubrey who were talking intently across the room, their hands locked. "What about you? You seemed off earlier." Chloe asked, her fingers lazily tracing patterns over Beca's thigh.

Beca smiled over at Stacie and Aubrey, giving her time to work on her poker face. “Yeah...I was just upset about Jesse” Beca said, feeling awful at lying to Chloe. She told herself that she'd tell Chloe the whole truth soon. She couldn't tell whether Chloe had seen through her lies but she squeezed the redhead and buried her face in her shoulder.

Chloe frowned, she realised this was the first time in their 2 years of friendship that Beca had kept something from her when she'd directly asked and it gave her an uneasy feeling in her stomach. She thought to herself, that if Beca was hiding something, then she must have a reason and that she should just let it go. "Okay" She hummed, leaning her head on Beca's, that uneasy feeling settling and running through Chloe's entire body.

Beca truly felt awful, but she couldn't speak about it now. She also knew Chloe and she knew that Chloe knew something was up by the way she had just said ‘okay’ but her face stayed the same. Somewhere in the redhead's mind she'd be asking herself if she'd done something wrong that caused Beca to close up. Beca wanted to tell her that it wasn't her fault but there were about 7 other people in the room and one of them was bound to hear. Beca shifted away from Chloe in order to reach her phone from her pocket. She typed out a message to Chloe and sent it, trying not to make it obvious that she just texted the girl sat right next to her.

*You're right, something is on my mind. I will tell you but I just need to be ready to talk about it. It's not you! I promise.*

She toyed with adding a kiss or a smile emoji but decided against it, they irritated her at the best of times.

Chloe felt the pocket of her jeans buzz and pulled her phone out, frowning in confusion when she saw Beca's name on the screen. Unlocking her phone, she breathed a sigh of relief at Beca's words. The relief however, was short lived as she wondered what on earth Beca was thinking about. She knew all about needing time to talk to people though so she typed out a reply to Beca.   
  
*You know I'm here for whenever you're ready :) xxxxxxxxxx*

Beca read the reply, finding the amount of kisses oddly cute. She smiled and replaced her phone back in her pocket. Replying would make it too obvious the pair were texting each other. She took Chloe's hand and moved closer giving her a light squeeze to let the redhead know she got the message and appreciated it.

After several hours of joking with the Bellas, Stacie announced that she was heading to bed, pulling a certain, very tired looking, blonde with her. "Mmhmm I bet you are" Cynthia Rose teased and Stacie shot the gang an exaggerated wink as Aubrey looked horrified at the lewd comments being shouted. Shaking her head with laughter, Stacie said softly "C'mon sleeping beauty", pulling Aubrey up the stairs. Chloe checked the time, noticing how late it actually was. "You wanna head up too?" She asked Beca, before realising just how domestic that sounded and how she'd assumed Beca even  _ wanted _ to go to bed with her. "I mean, if you want, you don't have to" the words stumbled out and the redhead's cheeks flushed a colour not dissimilar from her hair at how ridiculous she sounded.

Beca yawned as she stood. "Yeah, I'm gonna sleep in my room tonight" she said holding back a smile.

"Oh" Chloe really tried to hide the disappointment in her voice, that, and whatever secret Beca was keeping leaving a bitter taste in her mouth. "Okay" she said quietly as she stood herself, not meeting Beca's eyes.

Beca couldn't bare it anymore and squeezed the redhead around the waist from behind, grinning. "I'm only kidding, Chlo! I'd be honoured to share a bed with you tonight." Beca said holding Chloe's hand and bowing in front of her in the way people do in front of royalty.

Cynthia Rose's yell of "I bet you would" didn't go unnoticed by either Beca nor Chloe and the redhead took full advantage, grabbing Beca's hips and pulling her in for what could've been a kiss, instead, when their faces were centimetres apart she said "That was mean. You better make it up to me." She released her grip on Beca, throwing the brunette a wink before sauntering up the stairs with Beca practically sprinting behind her.

Chloe had already reached her room and Beca was close behind. As she passed Stacie's room, she could hear the pair talking enthusiastically. She smiled to herself, happy for the pair, that they had found each other. She entered Chloe's room and flopped backwards onto the bed, exhausted.

Not paying attention to the brunette that she  _ knew _ was watching her from the bed, Chloe turned so her back was towards Beca and stripped to her underwear, folding her clothes and letting them drop onto her desk chair. She smirked to herself as she heard Beca's breath hitch as Chloe bent down to take an old, oversized t shirt from the bottom draw, to sleep in. Slipping it on, she turned back to Beca, the smirk still sitting comfortably on her lips. "I'm still mad at you." She said, her voice low as she crossed the room to sit crossed legged on the bed opposite Beca. "That was really mean of you." She pouted, knowing it was the brunette's weakness.

Beca got worried, she moved forward and placed a hand on Chloe's knee. “I'm sorry, I was just having a joke, I won't do it again” she said sincerely as she rubbed her thumb back and forth comfortingly as she looked up at the redhead with her dark blue eyes. Her mind wandered, back to that night, when everything in her life changed. She blinked and Chloe's face came back into view. Beca cleared her throat and lowered her head to rest in Chloe's lap.  

Chloe absentmindedly stroked Beca's hair. "I don't want you to be sorry Becs" she said, drawing out the brunette's name as she trailed a finger along the curve of Beca's neck. "I want you to make it up to me" she punctuated the last five words with step-like tapping of her fingers across Beca's shoulder. When Beca turned to look at her, Chloe smirked again, letting her know that she wasn't really mad; she just enjoyed watching the younger girl squirm a little.

Beca smiled sadly. She knew Chloe had kissing and other kissing related...stuff in mind but the truth was she just wasn't in the mood. She stalled lifting her head as she stretched tiredly and yawned. “Oh, yeah?” The brunette asked with a small smile as she sat up to face the redhead. “What did you have mind?” She asked quietly managing to sound somewhat flirty.

Chloe noticed the change in Beca's demeanour and kissed her on the nose gently. "I'll sleep on it and let you know" she chuckled, shifting on the bed until she was under the covers, holding them up for Beca to join her. Beca slipped in next to Chloe, who promptly slid her arms around the smaller girl's waist, her face pressed into Beca's shoulder. "Night Becs" she mumbled softly, her voice muffled as she blindly reached for the light switch on the wall behind her.

As the light went off Beca allowed her smile to fade as she replied. “Night, Chlo” Beca shifted so she was turning more in Chloe's direction as she closed her eyes. “I love you” she whispered before being dragged under by the pulls of sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought since it had been so long and the previous chapter was entirely Staubrey (I do adore those two!) that I'd upload two chapters at once! Thanks for all the positive comments and support!


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